Well, Kelly, what have you got for me this month?
A toothache and a splinter.
I can maybe throw in a backache for the right price.
Kelly, this is the Sankaran issue, we have to look good!
Oh, we do? That may be a problem then.
Nevermind, I’m going with Caralyn’s father!
Caralyn’s father is in the news again? What is it this time?
Well, we’ll let Caralyn explain it. Caralyn in FIVE-4-3-2-and…cue Caralyn!
Egads! Should I start talking now?
If it’s not too much trouble!
Right! So, here we are again, back at the lovely Hpathy.com amiptheater in beautiful downtown….wherever….and my father once again is suffering from another malady. I think everyone here knew that my father had gout, then he had allergies, and now he has very bad leg cramps! My mother said he was actually crying with the pain!
He has suffered with this for as long as he can remember. This is the routine: During sleep he is awakened by a BAD CRAMP in his calf. This randomly happens to either leg. For a man who does not complain much he simply says that he wakes up and he has to walk. He walks around for about 15 minutes until the pain fades away. He basically knows what to expect; that is, until the other night when he visited us.
According to him, he had the worst cramp ever! He walked and walked around the living room for more than half an hour while the rest of the family slept. The sensation was so strong and the discomfort so debilitating that he could not “walk off the pain” as he put it. Eventually the pain subsided. However, during breakfast he said that he felt the aftermath of the pain. His leg was throbbing. Earlier that week, in addition, he said that he had pulled something in his knee. This knee injury was quite painful so he found himself favoring the other knee. Now the other knee was hurting from the extra pressure. To make a long story short he was having a painful week. Now both knees were hurting. His legs were throbbing from the cramps and he was feeling completely wiped out.
What a calamity!
Exactly! So, I asked my father a lot of questions pretending that I was someone who might be able to help him.
So, I asked him to describe the pain. He said that the pain felt like something too large was trying to fit into something too small. He said that the feeling was of a tightness. He said that the only thing that helped his pain was to walk. I asked about thirst. “What do you like to drink, Dad?” I said. “Milk,” he said.
It was at that point that my stand-up comedian father, who loves nothing more than to poke fun at the “witchcraft” we call homeopathy, agreed to take a few pellets under his tongue of _________30C. I felt like my choice was appropriate, but honestly did not feel confident that I could help him. After 20 minutes, I said to my father, “Dad tomorrow I think that you will feel much better.” To my utter shock he said, “I already do. My legs have stopped throbbing.” Well yahoo for me! My father then said, “Where can I go to get this stuff?”
Caralyn, how is he now?
The throbbing subsided right away, the cramps have not come back and the next day his knees felt better. They started to hurt a few days later, just slightly. He repeated the __________ in water, twice a day for a week. He feels fine now.
Caralyn, do you know what Jimmy McCracklin says?
Probably not, but knowing you, he says it in a song!
That’s right, Caralyn; he says you gotta do “The Walk”:
If you know the answer to this month’s quiz, write to Elaine at [email protected]
Elaine Lewis, DHom, CHom takes online cases. Visit her website at: elainelewis.hpathy.com