Mom, it’s time for the quiz again!
I would like to start my announcements by saying that Paul McCartney turns 74 on June 18th.
How come he looks better than I do?!
Well, Mom, he’s a vegetarian, and I’m guessing he doesn’t eat like a pig.
Oh. Well, that explains it.
Also, countdown to the Paul McCartney concert at Citizens Bank Park!
Right! On July 17th!
No, Mom, it’s July 12th!!!!
Really? OMG. We’d have been late!
Mom!!! What’s the point in even having a calendar?? Here is a very interesting clip I found of Paul McCartney on the Conan O’Brien Show. (Isn’t he adorable?)…
Back then, Paul was promoting his solo album “Flaming Pie”.
No one cares, Shana! But seriously, I have to admit, this was the funniest interview I’ve ever seen in my life! I laughed so hard I was in tears!
It’s so obvious Coney is a Beatles fan. I saw a video of him from four years ago when he still had his beard.
No, Coney! Mom, please try and keep up! And I guess George’s son, Dhani Harrison, showed Conan his father’s guitars for some reason. Anyway, I have one other famous birthday to announce. Drake Bell of “Drake and Josh” turns 30 June 27th.
I can’t believe I’ve been watching him on TV since he was 15.
I can’t believe it either!
I remember him from “The Amanda Show”. He looked so young back then. He was in a great sketch where he did a New York accent. I’ve been trying to copy it: “F’get about it! F’get about it!”
Keep practicing, you’ll get it.
“F’get about it!”
OK, you know what? We’re really getting off the beaten path here. Do you have any announcements that might remotely be of interest to our Indian and Pakistani readers?
I had something to say about Dan Schneider, the creator of “Drake And Josh”.
No, no, no! Nobody cares about Dan Schneider!
And I also can’t believe that “Drake And Josh” has no complete-series DVD set!
Earth-shattering as that is, we really have to move on.
Can you believe I never taped the 2008 “Drake And Josh” Christmas special?
Do I have to answer now? Or can I phone a friend?
You have no idea how much I want a “Drake And Josh” reunion!
Even more than a “Kenan and Kel” reunion?
Even more! By the way, my favorite episode of “Drake And Josh” is from Season 3 and is called “Sheep Thrills”. I’ll try to sum it up for you. It seems little sister Megan bought a sheep online…
Shana!!!!! We really have to move on!!!!!
I was just going to talk about the “Dick Van Dyke Show”!
Oh. Well that’s different. Never mind! Did you know that Dick Van Dyke is supporting Bernie Sanders?
It seems that Dan Schneider was a fan of the “Dick Van Dyke Show”.
Again with Dan Schneider?????
Mom, if you can possibly be patient, I was trying to say that Dan Schneider…
This is the most press Dan Schneider ever got!
…was so enamored with sitcoms from your day, that he worked classic scenes from “I Love Lucy”, “The Dick Van Dyke Show” and “Family Ties”, etc. into all his shows! Here are Drake and Josh re-enacting the classic Lucy and Ethel chocolate factory sketch, it’s called “I Love Sushi”.
Very clever. Shana, the video’s not playing. I don’t know why, but, we can’t use it. Do you have anything else you’d like to report on? Why don’t you get the Lucy and Ethel original, why watch 2 amateurs trying to imitate them?
We saw “Vaxxed”!
You asked if I had something else to announce.
Oh right!!! Well, where’s your review?
Mom, you know I’m not good at giving reviews!
You’re not? Then why are you here, exactly?
To make announcements!
Well great, that’s just great! OK, so we saw “Vaxxed”. You know what, Shana? This has to be a separate article or no one will see it but Maria, Wayne, and the Gang from Slovakia. Besides, you know what? We’re missing a very important announcement!
Yes! Muhammad Ali died!
Oh, I forgot!
I knew we had something important to say! He was famous — not just for being a real character, but he was the heavyweight boxing champion of the world; AND, he refused to fight in Vietnam! (“I ain’t got no quarrel with them Viet Cong.”) He was jailed for refusing to go to war, and they took his boxing title away. This is mainly why he’s so famous–his courage. He truly is and ever will be, “The Greatest Of All Time!” Peace, brother!
And now, on with the Hpathy Quiz!
Who is the patient?
It’s Fifi again, only she’s 6 years old this time.
What’s wrong with her?
Here’s the case.
Male or Female: Female
Weight: 38 pounds
Date: January 25, 2013
Email Address: email@example.com
Describe the complaint
On Tuesday, around 5 pm, Fifi started sneezing; within the hour, she had also a small cough, wanted to be held and was in a rapid decline; she started a fever … not measured but probably not above 102; in the night, she was a little restless and did best when she had her head on me; her cough … I think was croupy; it is now lessened and may be ‘dry’; the second day, she was again worse starting when the sun went down.
Well, her School had her outside in the cold with no gloves or boots in 20 degree F. weather! This all started 2 hrs after that.
Headache, tummy pain (not consistent)
Red cheeks, white tongue … with strawberry look to it. Swollen glands; her nose was a little irritated at the edges.
Definitely worse in the evening – Wants me to touch her, but not her little sister, wants my company, but no one else; wants tea (lemon), warm juice, hot chocolate; in the night, did have extreme thirst for water. Likes to be under a blanket; when not covered, she has goose bumps.
sneezing – the last two days; not as much now; some runny nose, but not really able to blow it all out, just a little in a tissue at a time.
her eyes are getting a little puffy
no real color.
thirsty at night, wants company, wants to be held … only by me.
pretty neutral, she is patient about asking for stuff from me … like water, etc. Her voice is sometimes hoarse. but not really irritable.
What have you been saying?
I don’t want my sister to touch me.
What are you doing?
Playing games on ipad, alert, engaged in movie or game, not too talkative, but certainly not inert, but not playing with the energy of a 6 yr old– all activity is on the couch.
Describe your thirst and appetite–
Some thirst … but not constant, warm drinks, really had a big thirst at night for water.
Mostly a night fever, dry.
What is most striking, peculiar or identifying about your condition?
The weird looking tongue. Fever. Sneezing at first.
Is there a diagnosis?
My self diagnosis, based upon her tongue, is scarlet fever.
Describe your energy–
Restless during sleep.
What does your tongue look like?
White with strawberry seeds.
If the fever comes on at night, and the thirst comes on at night, is it safe to say that Fifi has fever with thirst?
Give her _________________ 30C two doses in two hours.
I only got two doses in before she fell asleep.
Been peaceful with no restlessness and no fever.
She has energy and is laughing and making movies
but she still has runny nose and coughing.
“Healing takes place from the inside out”, so, this outcome is just what we want to see. Stick with _________________30C.
We are going out with this great clip I found of Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier on The Dick Cavett Show, you can see what a larger-than-life character Ali was. He was a national treasure, we will all miss him. See you again next time.
Elaine Lewis, D.Hom., C.Hom.
Elaine takes online cases! Write to her at [email protected]
Visit her website: elaineLewis.hpathy.com