Mom, what are you doing?
I’m taking a picture of our dinner, Shana.
Any particular reason?
Shana, you know how I’m always telling people to stop eating junk food, “corporate food”, fast food and packaged food; food made with white flour and white sugar?
It sounds familiar….
The problem is, I don’t think people know what to eat anymore! So, I’ve decided to start photographing my meals. Here we have a lovely shrimp salad* which I made myself!
That’s very nice, Mom. Do I have pizza for later?
Shana, ix-nay on the izza-pay!
What??? Richard Nixon eats pizza but refuses to pay???
No! Didn’t you ever learn to speak Pig Latin?
Did I ever learn to speak like a pig in Latin????
This is what’s wrong with the schools today, folks!
Mom, let’s just start the quiz…. Who is our president, I mean patient, today?
Actually, it’s Richard Nixon.
I knew it! I had a premonition you were going to say that! Let me guess, it’s a different Richard Nixon!
How did you know? OK, here we go with “Nixon Can’t Take the Heat”:
1. Describe the complaint
Fever every 6-8 hours up to 101-102 deg F. Onset could be due to walking in the sun for a longer period and mental exertion.
Walking in the sun.
Chills with shivering up & down back with the fever.
4. Appearance –
Nothing stands out.
5. Location –
6. Modalities-What makes your complaint better or worse?
worse sweat, exertion.
7. Concomitants (other symptoms that are “along for the ride”)-
Diarrhea (semi solid) fever and chills and tiredness.
I am chilly, do not have much thirst, and agg: by both heat & cold.
Get tired easily.
10. The mentals:
The complaint makes me worried and anxious.
11. What have you been saying?
I want company, but not too much conversation.
12. What are you doing?
Along with the fever there is restlessness, with pacing around, and being unable to focus on anything for very long like music or books.
13. Describe your thirst and appetite-
Thirst is less, frequent sips.
Fever 101-102 degrees F
15. Sweating? Describe. When does the sweating occur? Where on the body?
Mostly on face and covered parts like chest. Usually never on legs. No particular staining.
When I eat meat, the flatulence and stools have an offensive smell.
17. What is most striking, peculiar or identifying about your condition?
Small complaints seem to weaken me very much.
18. Is there a diagnosis?
Not by an MD. Seems like a virus.
19. Describe your energy-
Nervous, restless, agitated, prostrated, and also strangely apathetic.
Rx: Mr. Nixon, I would like you to take ____________________30C right away. Take it in a bottle of spring water 4 times a day with 5 succussions before each dose, let me know in a few hours if it’s helping.
Dear Dr. Elaine,
Thanks very much for the ______________________30C, this has hit the spot regarding the fever, and I had a good night last night.
(* Elaine’s Shrimp Salad Recipe – Lettuce, cherry tomatoes, cucumber, avocado, chopped onions, grated raw cheddar cheese and shrimp fried (briefly) in butter and minced garlic. Ranch dressing. )