It’s time for the Quiz!
Shana, is this your new greeting? You’re not saying Hello anymore?
Mom, I know you want me to stop aging…
Are you changing the subject?
Yes, I’m changing the subject!
From what to what?
I’ll be 28, April 22nd!
No way! Well, don’t tell anybody! Let’s pretend it’s not happening!
There’s actually an Elton John concert that happened on this day 22 years ago in Minneapolis.
Have we changed the subject again?
It was during his Big Picture tour, to promote the album of the same name. There’s no video footage of it, though.
Really? Well thanks for announcing the fact that we have nothing to announce!
I wish I could’ve been there but I was only 6.
And who says you can’t do math?!
Still important to note, and leads nicely into my next announcement.
I’m still not clear on what the first one was. Was it about your birthday that we’re not mentioning?
Elton John’s self titled album is 50 years old.
Hey, so am I.
No you’re not, Mom!!!!! It’s actually his second album and was his debut in the United States. I’m not sure how many people know that his actual first album was “Empty Sky”. It came out in 1969.
Trust me, no one knows!
That’s where “Skyline Pigeon” came from.
Skyline Pigeon??? Alright, Shana; your announcements are starting to really go off the rails!
Anyway, this is important to mention because “Empty Sky” is the one that brought us his classic. Oh wait. That was the self-titled album.
Oh geez! Not “Your Song” again! I have heard this song every day for the past 50 years!!!!
And here it is again!
I also, unfortunately, have to report that I really do not like his hair piece.
Fascinating as this is… shouldn’t we move on to the Death Report?
Yes, I have a death to announce. Country singer Kenny Rogers died at age 81 last month. Apparently he was under hospice care. I’m sure everyone remembers his rendition of “Ruby, Don’t Take Your Love to Town” in 1969 as a member of The First Edition.
I never realized what a disturbing song it was, which is probably why I can’t stand to hear it anymore.
Yes, disturbing; disarmingly so, as its lilting melody belies its dark content. An anti-Vietnam War song, as I remember.
Apparently it’s based on a real life story about a wounded soldier in Germany sent to recover in England and he married his nurse. The real story ended with the man killing his wife in a murder-suicide.
Yikes!!!! Well, geez, here it is then:
Heavy material with an infectious, folk-song-y melody.
Another thing Kenny Rogers will be remembered for is his duet of “Islands in the Stream” with Dolly Parton. It was written, of course, by my favorite musical trio, the Bee Gees!
Barry Gibb produced Kenny’s 1983 album “Eyes that See in the Dark” and the Dolly/Kenny duet is on it.
I also read in Charlie Horner’s newsletter that Phil Phillips (“Sea of Love”) died at age 94 last month.
OMG! I loved that song since the first time I heard it in 1959! Here’s “Sea of Love”, played on Bandstand with the kids dancing to it. Did I ever mention I was on Bandstand 3 times?
Finally, a member of The Sons of Robin Stone died on March 14th at 79: Francis (“Franny”) Flynn. He was the bass singer.
Their record, “Got To Get You Back”, is Philly classic! It shoulda been a HUGE hit! Boy, did they get robbed!
Here they are, my blue-eyed soul brothers, The Sons of Robin Stone from 1974, Franny is 4th from the left on the video–a very rare video as there is practically no film footage on this group at all, so, we’re lucky to have this:
And now, we should probably start the quiz.
I am writing you about my 17-year-old daughter. About three years ago, she developed iron deficiency anemia. She then developed severe menstrual bleeding (not painful, just prolonged – weeks or months long).
She had to get a blood transfusion (2 units) in Jan 2016. We have tried many different doctors – naturopathic, chiropractic, and gynecological. Some have been helpful, but the protocols were just too much for my teenage girl to keep up with. After the blood transfusion, the doctors talked me into putting her on continuous birth control pill treatment to stop the bleeding.
She felt better but now she still cannot absorb iron (and probably other nutrients?). On her last blood test, her ferritin was 17. She tested negative for celiac disease on 12/27/16, but her current naturopathic doctor has her on a gluten free diet for 4-6 weeks (she has never had any bowel symptoms). If that doesn’t help, she wants to do a food intolerance panel to see if other foods are causing an inability to absorb nutrients. This has gone on for so long, that I can hardly stand to see her like this for another 4 to 6 weeks, or longer depending on the results of the food intolerance test. My daughter is currently pale, has dark circles around her eyes, and is very tired despite being on supplements and iron. She is a dancer and cannot dance when she feel like this, and of course she can’t think clearly when she is trying to do school.
Can you help?!!!
I can try! I would have to send you the adolescent questionnaire for you and her to fill out, though.
OK, so I am sitting here with “Maxi” to get back at this. (She is coloring so she can sit still.)
Is sitting still a problem?
Yes. She has to be moving a part of her body, or doing something (playing music on the phone, texting, etc.).
Does this make studying a problem if she has to keep moving?
No, not if she is reading. Math is a little more of a problem, but after she sits down and settles in, she can usually do it.
Um….does she move fast and talk fast too?
When she is awake (an hour or so after she gets up), she moves fast and talks fast
Does she interrupt you when you’re talking?
Yes, it’s a family trait inherited from my husband. She would say that she does not interrupt. It might be more that she changes topics quickly and I can’t keep up. My husband does that too. Yeah, it’s starting to look like they could be the same remedy. She also told me that she decided to drink alcohol last night.
What??? Is alcohol a problem?
It is a problem with my husband. That is why I am in Al-Anon. “Maxi” drinking is a new thing and I don’t know if it is a problem, other than legal drinking age is 21 here and she is only 17. We are in the process of figuring out what to do about her drinking this weekend…2 beers and 2 Mike’s Lemonades over a 6 or 7 hour period (something we do NOT approve of!). She said she felt fine this morning and had no affects from the drinking, but I would think that the way she felt today DID have to do with her drinking last night . This is the first time that we know of she has drunk (at a friend’s party) and got up at 9am. She also took 2 Extra Strength Non-Aspirin Acetaminophen at 11am yesterday to get rid of her 2 day headache. The headache went away, but came back around 10pm, when she took 2 Motrin at her friend’s place.
Have you looked at the side effects of the Birth Control Pill to see if you spot any of her symptoms there?
No, but I’m sure there are lots of her symptoms there.
Does she over-spend? Money?
No she just doesn’t have a steady job but she has guinea pigs and a hamster that she needs to buy food and supplies for, and she tries to buy the gas for her car. She also wanted to go to a rodeo recently that cost $35 and she didn’t have the money for that, nor did we parents feel obliged to pay for it. She is actually pretty responsible with money. She probably is just looking forward to finishing school so she can work full time and earn money for what she needs AND wants.
This has been an emotional email for me. I can’t seem to address any of the questions about Maxi’s childhood and current behavior without crying. Nor can I think clearly about it. And when Maxi asked me what was wrong and I told her I was trying to explain her “fits” as a child, she snapped into anger mode.
What was that like, exactly?
She said I let her act that way.
Oh, so she blamed you for her tantrums as a child. And I take it she’s very defensive? Nothing’s ever her fault, it’s always somebody else’s fault?
She was frowning/scowling. Then she went to her room and laid on her bed with her phone. I have always said that I didn’t know how to parent as well with our first and have learned many parenting skills with the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th children. If I were to analyze her response, I would say that she felt defensive about being a difficult child, and wanted to make me feel bad in order to make herself feel better. The common “blame someone else for your problems” syndrome. My husband does that too. And so does my 3rd child. Maxi also woke up with a headache and went back to bed to try to get rid of it, so she is unavailable to answer questions.
Do headaches often come on after sleep?
Not usually. Her headaches usually come on during the day.
I’m thinking I need to write about more than I can remember and/or things that I have blocked out or just details about our family life – marriage troubles, living with the disease of alcoholism
Is it just your husband who’s an alcoholic? Are there others?
There are others in the family: My husband’s paternal grandfather was an alcoholic. My father became an alcoholic in his late 50’s or early 60’s and is still living. My brother might have a drinking problem. Both of my mother’s parents were alcoholics and some of my mother’s siblings.
And I have chosen not to drink at home or around my husband in support of him. If I have a dinner or a weekend with my friends, I will have a glass of wine, but alcohol is not a part of our family life anymore. But the disease of alcoholism still affects us all.
My behavior before I joined Al-anon, our faith journey as a family, changes in parenting methods over the years. It is all just overwhelming. I have a meeting with my Al-anon sponsor today, so I am going to talk things over with her and then attempt to get back to this email this evening. I hear Maxi awake…
For the time being, try Ferrum phos 6X 3 times a day for the iron deficiency.
It is really not normal to have so many headaches. Usually the cause is sugar. Processed food is a major source of sugar as is food made of white flour. I would strongly recommend that you read my “Convalescence” article and see if you can put some of the suggestions into practice:
A good reminder! We already do raw milk, although the goats are done milking until they start kidding this spring. I may have another source, but we may be out of raw milk for a few months. We have a juicer, which I have made juice for Maxi in the past. Maxi is more inclined to make a smoothie in the Ninja, which is what she did tonight to go with her dinner. She could certainly make some improvements to her diet. I have raised her on no white flour, no sugar, etc., but she doesn’t like to eat like that all the time. She likes to bake with the white stuff, even though I have LOTS of healthier version recipes. She sometimes will use half white flour and half whole wheat and reduce the sugar or use honey instead of sugar, but she likes to “do her own thing” – much like she has been her whole life. Does that make sense? I can only tell her so many times.
Here’s the questionnaire:
Adolescent’s name: “Maxi”
Parent’s name: Maxi’s Mom
Parent’s email address:
Gender (male or female): female
Weight: 120 pounds
Height: 5’ 4”
Date of Birth: 3/18/99
Body type: medium height, lean.
[Heads-up, everybody: Maxi and her mom are both answering. You can usually figure out which one is which. Also, pay attention to the questions I ask, they should give you insights into case-taking.]
- What is the chief complaint?
Anemia (fatigue, headaches, low energy, brain fog) and prolonged menstrual bleeding without continuous use of the birth control pill.
How long would her periods be without the BCP and how long are they now, and what has the Pill done besides lessening her bleeding time?
Her longest bleeding before BCP was about 4 months long with a few days here and there with no bleeding. (See the calendar attached) She is taking the pill continuously so she is not bleeding other than some spotting, which has been happening more lately (about half the days of December 2016 and the first week of January 2017. The pill made her more hungry and caused about 10 pounds of weight gain. After about five months she lost her appetite and lost the 10 pounds.
OK, so as I understand it, anemia struck first, then after that, menstrual bleeding would last for months at a time? Was it heavy bleeding or just spotting? Was it bright red blood, or a different color, with or without clots? What color were the clots? And so I guess the bleeding only made the anemia worse, right? Has the BCP done anything to make her feel stronger? Less anemic?
Yes, I THINK it happened in that order. The chart I sent shows the level of bleeding each day. When she was bleeding heavily, it was dark red with lots of clots. The clots were dark red too. Yes, the bleeding made her feel horrible – lots of sleeping. After the blood transfusion and getting on BCP she felt much better until about December 2016 when she started feeling very tired again. But I wouldn’t say the BCP makes her feel less anemic, just stopped the bleeding, which helped her.
- When did the problems start if not already mentioned?
Irregular bleeding in October 2014, but we think anemia began late that summer. I don’t think there was a specific event… there was a lack of meat because of a new diet mom had been doing with us all and also some added stress with school and friends.
So are you saying first you became a vegetarian, then came anemia, then came prolonged periods? Can you describe the vegetarian diet you were eating?
Yes, although it wasn’t a strict vegetarian diet. We still ate some local farm raised beef and store bought chicken and fresh caught fish (once or twice a week). We ate a lot of Dr. Joel Fuhrman’s recipes with beans and veggies. We started eating the Fuhrman recipes around July 2013. Her heavy/prolonged bleeding started October 2014 through December 2014. She didn’t have her first blood test until Jan 2015, which showed she was severely anemic (iron stores were 2.8). But we THINK the anemia started in the summer of 2014.
- What aggravates your complaint/s?
Stress about people around me, school, dance, relationships and future; A lot of anxiety. And if I don’t eat, I feel it later.
Can you explain the phrase “stress about people around me”? You seem to be saying you have an issue with anxiety. When did that start and what is it like for you, how do you experience it?
Well, sometimes I think people are just judgmental and not worth being around. I have a real problem going out of my way to make friends too…. I don’t really remember when it started, maybe 15? I was pretty anti-social as a teenager, but I got better when my health improved in Jan 2016. But lately, I go from extremely negative and rude, to super happy and hyper. Anxiety can either make me really jittery and I feel light headed, or I shut down completely and sleep for hours.
(After typing this, she laid down on the floor and went to sleep – 6:45pm our time).
Why the floor? It sounds uncomfortable. From what you say, it sounds like you’re bi-polar. Have you always been this way?
The floor was the closest place – she was very tired. And when she sleeps in her room, she will sleep for hours and she didn’t want to sleep that long.
I don’t know if its bi-polar or unstable hormones. I’ve always had a temper, but I don’t think that I’ve always been this crazy…
Maxi does not like too much heat. She wears tank tops and shorts all year round.
Wow! She must be very warm; for how long? Do you think the BCP is the cause of this or has she always been very warm? Even with anemia she’s warm? Usually that makes people cold, that’s why I’m asking.
She has always been very warm – was always in summer dresses or a swim suit playing in a pool or sprinkler when outside in summer. In winter, the wood stove that is cozy warm for the rest of us is too hot for her. And yes, even with anemia she is warm.
Very interesting! It would tend to eliminate all the chilly remedies. I have to pick up Shana now, I will get back to you later.
- And now the opposite of #3: what makes the complaint, or you, better?
Being happy and feeling successful about accomplishments that day. When I have enough iron and water too that really helps my energy and attitude.
Are you taking commercial iron pills? I would rather see you taking herbal iron. Commercial iron supplements are actually toxic. Did I already mention this? Or maybe I’m thinking of one of my other clients with anemia. If I’ve mentioned this already, just ignore me. But I would like you to buy these two herbal supplements. One is herbal iron and the other is a formula for the female reproductive system to hopefully stop the bleeding and spotting so you can stop the birth control pill:
She used to take GNLD (NeoLife) Chelated Iron
But her current naturopath doctor switched her to Iron Extra by Vitanica – we buy it in her office. She had some reasons for the switch, but can’t remember. You didn’t mention the toxicity before, but I will order the two supplements.
She loves music and having plans with friends. Both motivate her. Sometimes she wants a hug when upset, other times she DOES NOT want a hug.
Do you feel like you don’t know what to expect half the time?
She often has little patience with her three younger siblings (ages 11, 9, and 6). She often has trouble controlling her emotions and her tongue when someone (parents especially) says something she doesn’t like.
What would she typically say when someone says something she doesn’t like?
Usually it’s nonverbal – a humph or a rolling of the eyes or walking way. Sometimes, “Well, that’s dumb,” or a sharp, “Marvin!” or whoever’s name is applicable at the time.
- What is the worst time of day for you?
Afternoon. I always want to nap. Until about 6, than I’m usually fine.
Would you say you come alive at night?
Yes – like last night she was on the phone with a friend from 11pm to 1am. Then she got up at 10 am.
I have to take two of my kids to town for our home-school co-op. I will have Maxi answer #6 and I will work on it more this afternoon.
- What symptoms accompany the chief complaint (and your other complaints) if you haven’t already said?
I often have headaches along with dizziness, nausea, and neck pain.
How long have you been getting headaches? How old were you when they started?
Maybe 11? It feels like I’ve had them for a long time, which I have but not sure exactly when…
Did they start with the onset of menstruation or do they go back further? Or are they only since the massive bleeding started? Or a side-effect of some medication, or the result of being anemic?
Further back, but not as often as I would when I was bleeding a lot. Sometimes, like right now, I just have a constant headache.
You have a constant headache even now as we speak? If your mom doesn’t have a home remedy kit, then there’s nothing I can do to help you. She should order a 30C Emergency Kit straight away, which she can get from www.a2zhomeopathy.com How debilitating is your headache, what is it causing you to do? Where is it located, what does it feel like?
I will order the Emergency Kit as soon as I can get the money together. I do have quite a few (about 20 or so) remedies that I have collected over the years, so I may have something on hand before my kit arrives. Like, I had Ferrum Phos 30C, but I purchased the 6C today anyway.
Her headaches come and go and can sometimes last two days. Today’s headache is mild and dull, around her eyes and forehead. She can still function but has trouble focusing on school, which she can have school focus problems even without a headache.
Yes, I would say so, but she says that is just who she is. And she tries her best, but she is always and will always be distracted by every little thing, much like her father and one of her younger sisters.
Inability to focus? How long has she had this problem?
I first noticed it when I started homeschooling her. She had gone to kindergarten for a few months and I don’t remember the teacher saying she had focus issues. Maxi said there was lots to do and it was a “kid” environment so it worked, except that she would act up when she got home and there was already “girl drama” in kindergarten. That in addition to religious reason, we started home-schooling. That is when I noticed she had trouble focusing and sitting to do math and reading (she didn’t start reading well until she was 8 years old, but now is an avid reader and loves to read). She was able to sit still for poetry, science, and religion class.
What is it like, exactly?
Today, it looks similar. She still has trouble focusing on math and science, but she can make herself do it most of the time. But sitting here helping me respond to this email, she really needs the coloring book, or a phone with pictures or texting, or watching football to occupy the other side of her mind.
I seem to always get a headache doing school work though.
Yikes! This is no good! What is it about school that causes headaches? The lighting? Reading small print? Something else?
Her head being down, and long chapters to read, or topics that require much thinking, like math or biology.
So let me see if I’ve got this right. “Her head being down” causes headaches. Not sure what that means.
I am trying to clarify this with her…she says that she feels like there is always a potential for a headache coming on (probably because she doesn’t know what triggers them), so sitting at the table, with her head bent forward to read can give her a headache. I hope that helps. This one is hard to explain!
As for the other things, reading and having to concentrate cause headaches. Is that right?
Yes. Even if she is reading a pleasure book. But she can lay on her bed and reposition herself or the little book (unlike a text book or math book that is too big) to prevent the neck strain, but her eyes will get tired after 2 hours of reading and cause the headache.
How long has this been a problem?
Probably since she started high school – age 14.
How many times a week or a month do you get a headache? How long do they last?
At least every week. From a couple hours to a couple days.
What do you do make them go away or make them less painful? For example: cold compresses, hot compresses, lying in a dark room, sleeping, lying on the painful side, being out in the cold air, drinking lots of water, an ice bag, eating, etc. Where on your head is the headache located? What sensation does it have? For example, throbbing, stabbing, pressing, etc.
I learned that if it’s a “stress headache”, I use hot compress on my neck.
And to what extent does that work?
Most of the time. I try using lavender essential oil, lots of water, and Tylenol as a last resort. Throbbing and it can be in my forehead, whole head or neck.
The neck pain: Does the headache extend to the neck or is that just an extra spot that hurts while you have a headache? What’s the sensation of the neck pain? Which side of the neck hurts? What makes it worse? What makes it better?
It extends down my neck a bit but usually the back of my neck is where it is tight. My back will get tense too. Hot compress makes it better.
The nausea: same question. What can you tell me about it. What makes it better? What makes it worse?
Getting rid of the headache gets rid of the nausea. If I do feel that bad that’s when Aspirin comes in.
- (This question is for Mom and Dad only, and all questions up to and including # 11.) What was the pregnancy and birth like? Anything remarkable to report? Any traumas? Complications? Any drugs used like anesthesia, etc.? Anything to report about the mother’s health and disposition during pregnancy? Did she take any drugs or alcohol or cigarettes or marijuana, etc.?
Maxi was my first pregnancy. There were not complications in the pregnancy, but I was physically and mentally miserable. I had headaches and was tired. I had to work (at a desk) until close to the time she was born and just wanted to sleep the whole time. I had been experiencing depression before her pregnancy and it continued during pregnancy. I did not feel comfortable taking medication while pregnant. I may have taken Tylenol for headaches.
How often did you take Tylenol?
I looked at my pregnancy notes. I took Tylenol twice during Maxi’s pregnancy. I was also on Paxil for depression until week 17 of pregnancy. Despite the depression, I didn’t feel comfortable taking the Paxil, so I stopped.
Have you read the side effects of Paxil to see if they match any of Maxi’s problems? You can find Paxil at www.drugs.com
Here are the side affects of Paxil that match Maxi’s problems: headaches, lack of concentration, anxiety, decreased appetite, difficulty breathing, inability to sit still (unless doing something or watching TV), muscle tension and tightness (in back).
I don’t remember drinking alcohol during her pregnancy and I don’t smoke. Her labor was 32 hours long, including 2 ½ hours of pushing. I didn’t know anything about natural child birth at the time. (Baby #2 was natural in hospital, Baby #3 and #4 were home births). I can’t remember what I took during labor, but the first medication just made me fuzzy headed. Dilation of my cervix was very slow and I had to wait hours to progress far enough to get the epidural. After epidural, labor slowed, so Pitocin was used. Doctor had to help my cervix dilate fully in order to avoid a C-section. I think there were moments where baby’s heart rate was high and there were concerns and talk of C-section, but we made it through.
Did she seem to be normal despite all the medical interventions, or did you see problems early on?
All of her well baby check-ups were normal. I think she was pretty normal, aside from lots of temper tantrums and fits.
Yikes! That’s not normal! So you’re saying that even as a baby, there were signs that relate to today’s extreme behaviors of being either very happy or very negative?
So, I got out her baby book and notes that I took over the years. She was a happy, smiley, easy baby with a good appetite. We used the Baby Wise detachment parenting model and she was very happy with a daily schedule. She was in day care until she was 3 years old. The problems started somewhere around 18 months to 2 years old – when she was old enough to tell us “No” and to disobey. Her day care provider went back to work when Maxi was about 18 months. The new day care provider (soft, quiet personality) had troubles with Maxi (strong, loud personality). I think the main problem was her fighting with the other kids. I took her out of the second day care around age 2 ½. The third day care provider put her in a lot of time outs for fighting with other kids too. I know she hit other kids.
Tell me about the temper tantrums and fits.
From my notes about Maxi, when she was 4 ½, she wouldn’t get in the bath when asked without screaming and throwing a fit. Then she wouldn’t get out of the bath. She wouldn’t pick up her toys when asked. She would tell the other kids, “Fine! I won’t play with you!”. She would run away from me at a store or whine and cry if I made her stay in the cart. She would tell me “No” when asked to brush her teeth. And she would throw toys. When I quit my job and started a small day care in my home when she was 3 years old, she would get upset when day care kids played with her toys. She had trouble sitting still at the table. She would cry and be loud at church. She would back talk – “Mean Mom! Bad Mom! I don’t care!” The other thing is that when Maxi would throw a fit and we would walk away, she would follow us and throw herself down and scream more.
You might also want to know that she started sucking her thumb as a newborn and still does when she is stressed. We tried many times when she was younger to help her drop that habit, but nothing worked.
- Father’s health at time of conception: What was the father’s state of health and temperament? Was the father on any strong or addicting substances at the time of conception (see above examples)?
My husband’s health was good I would say. He was not a health nut like I am now, but he didn’t have any health issues. He drank alcohol (mostly beer) moderately at the time. He also chewed Copenhagen heavily at that time.
- The child’s milestones: was he late or early in learning to–crawl, walk, talk, wean, teethe, toilet-train, etc.?
Crawled at 8 months, walked at 12 months, spoke words after 1 year, spoke sentences at 2 years, only nursed for three weeks (Mom was stressed about having to go back to work and the 60 minute nursing sessions were too difficult to sit through), had breast milk in a bottle for a week, then switched to formula in a bottle at 4 weeks old. Her first tooth came in at 8 ½ months. Toilet training was a challenge – both for parents and for Maxi. She showed “interest” around 18 months, but didn’t get completely trained until almost 3 years old.
- Was the child vaccinated? Which ones did he have? Did he have a reaction to any of them?
Yes, vaccinated for Tetra (DTaP?), Polio (IPV), Tetra-Hib, Hepatitis B, Chickenpox, Hepatitis A
Any indication that after a certain vaccine or vaccines that things went bad for her?
No, we didn’t notice any reactions or behavior changes after vaccines.
Her vaccinations were given as a baby, and this behavior didn’t start until she was 18 mos. to 2 years.
- How did the child react to the birth of a younger sibling?
Before she had a younger sibling, she had my day care kids join our home when she was 3 years old. It was a big adjustment for her to share her space and things. We made her bedroom off limits for day care kids.
Her first sibling arrived when she was 6 years old and she reacted positively. She held her sister a lot and helped Mom with chores and taking care of the baby.
Her childhood was as an only child and center of our attention for 6 years and she was very challenging to parent. We didn’t know how to parent well and she has a strong personality. When she was having fun, she was really having fun. When she was upset, she was loud and screaming.
Kind of like how she described herself above, right? So, she’s always been like this, then. Would you say she goes to extremes?
Yes, she has always been like this and there are times when she goes to extremes. I have a hard time saying for sure though, because I only have my other three children to compare to and life with them is very different than life with Maxi.
Life was full and active until her siblings started arriving and then her life slowed down a bit. Her second sister arrived when she was 8 and her brother arrived when she was 11. Those were challenging years as a family in many ways.
- How do you react to school, what issues/problems do you have with it?
Getting behind in school always gets me down and rather depressed. Other than that it’s “alright”.
What kind of grades were you getting before the health crisis kicked in?
Maxi just jumped in the shower and is getting ready to go to a friend’s house, so I’ll try and answer these. Since she is home-schooled, grades are always A’s. It’s just a matter of how long it takes to earn the A. She has had more trouble thinking clearly since she has been anemic. And she has had to sleep more. She actually pretty much didn’t do one semester from her Sophomore year, but since we were able to work with our advisor and adjust courses so that she can still graduate this June. But it was pretty rough trying to distinguish between health problems and teenage laziness and procrastination. That was probably very stressful for her. And the fact that she couldn’t do school at all for so many months had her worried. And when she now gets tired and has to sleep and doesn’t get her school for that day done, I’m sure she worries that she won’t be able to catch up. But this year she got off to a good start and is working really hard to stay on track.
- How do you feel about spending the night away from home?
Just fine. A bit of a break.
- How do you feel about travelling?
- Give an idea of how much prescription drug treatment you’ve had over the years, and for what?
Only the birth control pill since last January.
- Any skin conditions treated with cortisone-type cream?
Eczema as a child until Mom learned about oatmeal baths and goat milk soap.
- Did you have an especially severe childhood illness? Tell me as much as you can about it.
- When you’re ill or upset, to what extent do you want sympathy, consolation and support; or would you prefer to be alone?
I don’t like being alone 80% of the time… Support is good once I’m able to talk about what’s bothering me.
- What are your well-meaning friends and relatives always trying to change about you or help you with?
Well my best friend tells me I should be nicer and be positive but then I’ll tell her the same thing. My parents tell me to be patient and keep my tone of voice “modulated”.
My mother used to say the same thing to me! “Elaine, modulate your voice.”
- What feed-back do you get from teachers, school counselors, camp counselors, coaches, etc.?
I don’t really have any (she is home-schooled and she only has dance teachers who don’t really give her feed-back. People at church or parents of her friends always say she is beautiful and sweet.)
- How do you feel about and treat animals?
They’re all adorable and should be loved.
- What foods and drinks do you love?
Pasta is yummy and coffee is great.
How much coffee do you drink?
She drinks a cup of coffee once or twice a week.
Anything that’s going to make me fat, and most things that would keep me thin.
- What foods and drinks do you hate?
I don’t really have any except beans. Any beans.
- Do you desire ice or ice-cold drinks?
Ice-cold, I suppose.
- Describe the kind of eater you are.
I like eating, but if it’s not something I can just grab sometimes I forget to eat.
- What fears do you have? (Think! think! think! We’re all afraid of something; for example: heights, dogs, elevators, authority figures, insects, swimming in the ocean, germs, getting sick, abandonment, and so on.)
Fear of falling
Do you mean fear of falling from a height? Give me an example of where you might be afraid of falling. Like at the top of an escalator?
Oh that wouldn’t hurt much lol. More like a Ferris Wheel or cliff.
Well, I think under the circumstances, we’d all be afraid of heights! So, is that it? No other fears? Did I ask you if your complaints get better at the ocean?
You mean the anemia? Or the mood? The anemia does not get better. I remember one time we went to the beach and she layed down and slept the whole time because she wasn’t well. But her mood is better at the ocean (like most of us) because it’s calming and relaxing.
Deep ocean is a little freaky and I’m a pretty claustrophobic.
Give an example of a claustrophobic situation.
Well sometimes when I pull clothes out of the dryer lol. Or tight, concrete or rock places like caves, tunnels or under house crawl spaces.
- Do you tend to be chilly or hot?
- When are you most likely to perspire and where on your body?
After dance warm ups, my back, arm pits, and sometimes face. Takes a lot to break a sweat for me though.
You’re saying that in spite of being hot, you don’t readily sweat?
I used to think I would never sweat. I do now though after a long workout.
- How affectionate are you?
Weeeeeell, it depends on who it is and my attitude. I’m not the most affectionate person, but I won’t refuse a hug.
- How sympathetic are you? (Concerned with the suffering of others)
Unless it’s someone really close to me and it’s serious, I don’t really care….
- How affected are you by music?
It’s amazing. Pop, country, Celtic, jazz, classical…. It’s all pretty good.
- What emotion tends to predominate in you?
Depression. Giving up. Negativity.
- How neat or messy are you? Think about your room, your desk, your locker, etc.
Well I like everything on the outside to look neat. The clothes in my dresser though are never folded.
- How sensitive are you to criticism or reprimand?
It doesn’t bother me unless I have no idea what they are talking about.
- Do you have any digestive complaints?
Sometimes in the morning I feel sick after breakfast.
Why do you think that is? Are you not hungry for breakfast? Is it a meal you’d rather skip? Are you forced to eat? Is the meal too heavy? Have you tried lighter food like just fruit? A grapefruit, for example?
Sometimes I will wait till later to eat. Kind of to let my stomach get hungrier or something. Yes light food is good. I can never eat eggs,
Do you have an aversion to eggs?
No, they just don’t sit well in her stomach.
And meat settles unwell but I do love bacon and such. I usually just eat and feel a little queasy afterwards, no matter what.
- Any complaints with sleep?
I’ve been sleeping really good lately.
Do you know why that could be? Using the word “lately” implies that you used to have sleep issues, is that true? What were they?
Yes. I would wake up multiple times a night or way to early and have a hard time going back to sleep. Used to not be able to fall asleep either.
What factor changed your ability to sleep?
So, just two nights ago, she didn’t sleep well (full moon?). In talking with her, sometimes her eyes just won’t stay shut, they float open and her body won’t relax.
- Any skin issues–warts, moles, rashes, acne, etc.?
She had a small growth on her nose that was removed when she was about 13 years old.
Was that about the time she became anemic?
Can’t remember what it was – nothing serious.
- What is most striking, defining or characteristic about you?
Well I’m pretty sarcastic.
She is very pretty and very animated.
- How cooperative are you?
- What’s standing in your way of moving ahead?
Lack of information
OK, you’re gonna have to explain that!
I don’t know really. I mean this is going to be a lot of work to get better so I guess my health is in the way, or my occasional lack of motivation to get better or finish school. Nothing extreme though.
- How often do you get sick? Do you tend toward certain ailments?
Two or three times a year and it’s usually a bad cold. I haven’t had the flu for 2 years.
- Ask your mom what illnesses run in the family.
Paternal grandmother died of cancer in her 60’s. Paternal grandfather had a quadruple bi-pass open heart surgery, but is still alive at age 76.
Does alcoholism count?
Yes. So you’re saying your father was an alcoholic. Alcohol is one of our remedies. “Alcoholus”. I’ll have to look that up!
Yes, her father (my husband) is an alcoholic with 3 years of sobriety.
Father with 3 years sobriety, paternal great grandfather, maternal grandfather and various distant maternal relatives.
- What do you really love to do?
Reading, swimming, dancing, taking vacations with my family and hanging out with my best friends. Also I really love naps.
- Time-line (you may need your parent’s help): Make a list of traumatic events, whether physical or emotional, in order of occurrence, including such things as injuries, surgeries, drug therapies, emotional upsets, losses, disappointments, etc., that occurred in your life that had a profound effect on you and changed you. Include your age at the time, and how you coped/responded.
I had stiches on my lip when I was about 2 years old.
She was very scared and crying when stiches were happening – I and hospital staff had to hold her down.
She slammed her finger in the car door a couple years ago.
Ouch!!!! You know, Hypericum is for that. Do you have a homeopathy home remedy kit? This is what you need it for.
Are you saying she should take Hypericum now for the slammed finger from a couple years ago?
No, I think it’s too late. I mean, the next time this happens, give Hypericum.
She said that really bothered her.
She got so anemic in Jan 2016 that she had to have 2 units of a blood transfusion. When I told her we were going to the ER, she didn’t want to go. Once we got there and she realized that she was getting put to the front of the line, she realized how serious it was and was fine through the whole thing.
- Are you on any drugs or supplements at the moment, if not already stated?
- Do you throw the covers off at night or stick your feet out of the covers?
Never stick feet out! Sometimes a leg but I like my comforter.
That’s interesting. You’re a very hot person, but you keep the comforter on at night….
Well I have one soft blanket under me, (no sheet! Hate sheets.) and then a fluffy comforter. My room is at the back of the house where it’s cooler.
- Please give me an idea of what you eat/drink in a day.
Granola cereal for breakfast about 9 am,
Where do you get the granola? Does it come in a box? If so, what are the ingredients listed on the package?
Trader Joes. Yes. Whole Rolled Oats, milled cane sugar, vegetable oil, rice flour, almonds, cornstarch, honey, natural flavor, salt, barley malt syrup. Mom just bought some in bulk I think like you said.
OK, cuz there’s a ton of sugar in Trader Joe’s rolled oats! Add up the cane sugar, honey and malt syrup and you actually have more sugar in this product than oats! People swear there’s no sugar in their diets. But look at what you just saw! Sugar is the main cause of headaches, in my experience.
We are going to have to make our own granola. I went to Market of Choice today to buy bulk granola and the prices are $8-$14 a pound – not willing to pay that! And most of them are high in sugar.
Nachos (chips, cheese, beans, meat, sour cream, salsa) for lunch around noon
What kind of chips? What kind of cheese? I thought you didn’t like beans… Can you take a picture of this for me when you have it again? I’m having trouble picturing it.
Tortilla chips, cheddar cheese, and refried beans from a can. sure. and a casserole
What kind of casserole?
Well the other night it was like tomatoes, meat, cheese, and bread maybe? Or there was this cauliflower dish she made.
soup or meat for dinner around 6.
So for dinner you have a casserole, or meat, or soup; so, are you saying that for dinner it’s possible you might have meat and nothing else? What kind of soup do you have?
We also have salad and another side like cooked veggies. Lots of different soups… just made one with tomatoes, onion, apple, celery, carrot, parsley and vegetable broth.
We have raw goat’s milk and water.
Her breakfast is either a bowl of raw oatmeal soaked with goat milk and raisins on top or boxed cereal (rice chex–doing gluten free right now), honey bunches (before gluten free), or other cereal that has under 10 grams of sugar per serving).
Oatmeal sounds good but there’s no acceptable boxed cereal. Rice Chex contains BHT, sugar, white rice and a bunch of synthetic vitamins. Go to your health food store and buy the granola in the bins.
Yes, we know cereal is not good. Due to survival mode, I have allowed cereal but encourage oats and other healthier options. I just bought some granola for Maxi today.
You should read my articles on food, which are here:
especially my “Convalescence” article, which will really benefit her.
- Who’s a difficult person or persons in your life and why?
My parents sometimes… I don’t like being told what to do. There’s a few teenage girls I know that beg for attention and that really bugs me.
- Describe your nature.
Resourceful, fun, impatient, loud, restless
- What do you want to change about yourself?
I’d like to be a little more motivated or driven to get things done.
And is that a problem for you? Starting things but not getting them done?
Well getting started is the issue.
- What happens to you over and over again (the “story of my life”, as it were)?
Never keeping up with life. Being late. Running out of money.
- What are you most proud of?
I don’t know.
- What makes you cry?
Books, movies, songs, people
- What makes you angry? What do you do when you get angry?
The stupid things that people do. I try to “let it go” and “chill”. But let’s be real, I yell.
- What bothers you most in other people, how do you respond to it?
Their attitude and choices. Gossip if anything.
- Describe your thirst/drinking habits.
She must not be very thirsty, because she probably does not drink enough water.
- Sleeping: Any issues here, anything you’d like changed? What position do you sleep in?
I sleep in many, but usually on my stomach, one leg out, arm under pillow.
- What are you sensitive to? Think about noise, clutter, insects, injustice, music, the sun, the cold, pollen, fumes, etc.
She is sensitive to heat, younger siblings or any children who do not listen or do what they are told, a messy room, people who don’t make morally sound choices.
- Anything note-worthy about your appearance or your voice? For example, freckles, red hair, frowning, stuttering, whining, soft voice, loud voice, etc.
When she has energy, she moves fast and talks fast and as mentioned before is very animated. She has long naturally wavy dark brown hair that she gets complimented on all the time, but it took her years to figure out how to take care of it to her liking. I don’t think she knows how to whisper. She likes to talk loud or yell if “necessary”.
- What really gets on your nerves?
- What’s your ambition?
To succeed in life!
She wants to finish high school this June. Then she wants to figure out where she wants to work. She hasn’t made plans for college, but is open to taking classes for a specific career choice. She loves to make future plans with her boyfriend.
- Describe your energy (for example, are you slow, sluggish, hyper-active, peppy, enthusiastic, nervous, jittery, etc.?)
It’s either really hyper, calm, or dead tired.
What about snakes, any sort of feeling towards them, same for spiders?
I like snakes. I used to catch lizards and snakes when i was little. Spiders don’t bother me if they are smaller than my palm.
OK, so, here’s what I think the remedy is: ______.
I bought the remedy, ______________ 30c.
Maxi has been sleeping most of the day. It’s a 40 min drive home. I will wake her up when I get home. One or two pellets in water bottle, hit (succuss) 5 times, and sip?
I read the article you linked to. Wow! Many similarities to my husband and Maxi. In short, they are a lot alike. And yes, very defensive and nothing is EVER their fault. (My husband is learning to take responsibility in AA, but Maxi can’t seem to yet.)
So here’s what I would like: She’s off the pill now, right? I want to see if ___________ will stop the bleeding.
Maxi took a dose of __________ at 7pm. Her flow lightened up. She has a little bit of color in her face – not the usual white face with dark circles around her eyes. She’s not looking forward to going to bed – sleeping while on “period” is uncomfortable for her.
So, she said her headache is not bothering her anymore.
She was up making cookies and talking with her boyfriend until after 10. She was smiling and I didn’t hear her snap at anyone. Then she and I had a good talk. Her energy level is about a 7–up from 4 or 5.
Her bleeding lightened up. (But this on, off, light, heavy random pattern is what she has always done since she has been anemic).
She took a __________ dose at 11:20pm. She will be up for awhile talking to her girlfriend on the phone, but hopefully not too late, and hopefully she will sleep better tonight!
Thank you for your help.
Good morning! I slept really well, about 10 hours, and woke up with sweat around my neck…
My headache isn’t bothering me but I can still slightly feel it.
I didn’t bleed during the night either.
I think my energy level will be good today, but my legs are still shaky if I’m up for more than 15 min.
What should I take this morning?
No need to take anything unless you start to relapse.
I meant to email you last month, but things are so crazy!
So, Maxi had a period April 10th through the 13th. On her own, she took ___________ so it was a regular flow and short in length.
She just started again today. Should she take ___________ again? Or just see what her body does on it’s own?
Her emotions are better. She is able to do school, think about her future, and get through frustrations pretty well.
In a message dated 5/13/2017 10:12:33 P.M. Eastern Daylight Time, ***@icloud.com writes:
Maxi had 4 days of medium menstrual flow followed by one day of light or spotting (5/5/17 – 5/9/17). Then it stopped all on its own!
I assume that’s a big deal? Especially when we started she was bleeding constantly, right? And on the BCP? Oy.
Yes! When we started in January, she was on the BCP continuously to prevent constant bleeding, and emotionally out of balance.
——-[Many moons later]——–
From: Elaine Lewis [mailto:[email protected]]
Sent: Sunday, August 05, 2018 6:43 PM
Hi! I hope you remember me, we were doing homeopathy together about a year ago (I know, hard to believe so much time has gone by) and I just thought I’d check in and see how you were doing. Is Maxi still OK? I remember it all started because she had non-stop bleeding, right? Is that still OK now?
Yes, of course! I remember you. Maxi would still be hemorrhaging if it weren’t for you! She is still doing great in that department. I am pretty sure she is having normal cycles. She is also having normal “growing pains” since she finished high school and is working a couple part time jobs, living at home, and trying to discern her path in life.
OK, people! A long but fun case, right? This case was a great study of a certain remedy. Do you know what the remedy is? If so, write to me at [email protected]. The answer will be in next month’s ezine. Thanks for hanging in there! See you in May!
Elaine Lewis, D.Hom., C.Hom.
Elaine takes online cases and animal cases too!
Write to her at [email protected]
Visit her website: https://ElaineLewis.hpathy.com