Mom, it’s time for the July quiz!!
Before I start, this might be a good time for me to mention that I registered with hpathy.com so I can read the ezine every month now!
Now that that’s out of the way, I have good news, and as you know, it’s my job to spice up the Hpathy ezine with my timely announcements.
Is that what you’re doing?
It says so on my blurb written by Firuzi.
Aha! So Firuzi’s at the bottom of this!
Mom! I’m just living up to my title!
Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Shanapeeeeeeedia! Well that’s different. Never mind!
Now where was I???? Oh yes, announcement the first–The Scorpions!
Aaaaaaaah!!!! Oh no! Not the Scorpions again!!!!
We all thought they were going to retire but apparently they don’t want to quit just yet.
Well, great! That’s just great!
They want to just slow down and gradually stop touring.
No one cares, Shana!
Next year is the band’s 50th anniversary, they’re coming out with an album and there’s going to be a documentary.
I’m sure you’re wondering what all of this means.
I’m wondering how much it’s going to cost!
It means that they could end up touring the United States.
I think poor Klaus Meine is starting to feel his age, though…. I would give anything to see them perform before they officially retire! I swear, I will clean for the rest of my life, all month…
The rest of your life all month? You only have a month to live?
What I meant to say was, I’ll clean until I’m dead.
Oh. Well, that’s different. Never mind! (When are you going to start cleaning?)
Bands celebrate milestones by touring. So, time for me to put on my puppy dog eyes…
Shana!!!!!! That’s not fair!!!!!
My second announcement is about Smokey Robinson.
Yay!!!!!! Now we’re getting somewhere!
He has an album of duets coming out this year with Elton John and James Taylor.
Can’t you get into Smokey Robinson? He’s written over 60 hit songs! Did you know he wrote “My Girl” for The Temptations? I’ve got sunshine, on a cloudy day….
Ok, fine Mom, you win this one! Anyway…. To play us out will be the beautiful voice of Klaus Meine.
Oh dear God! Don’t you mean the nasal voice of Klaus Meine?
Here he is outside of a Rolling Stones concert in Berlin.
I wish I could get to see the Rolling Stones. Wouldn’t you like to meet Smokey Robinson? Or Barry Gibb?
Yes, due to the fact that they actually have TALENT!
I have lots of famous people I want to meet in case you haven’t noticed. Anyway Klaus Meine has a very unique style, does he not?
You’re right, he does not.
You even said so yourself on one occasion.
I must have been tripping on LSD.
Anyway here are the Scorpions with their 1984 cover of The Cars’ “Drive”.
They should only be allowed to do covers!
Now that I’ve finished my announcements, it’s time for the Death Report! You might want to sit down for this, Mom; even though you’re the one who told me–shouting from the living room. Bobby Womack died after a long illness.
I didn’t even know he was sick. My favorite songs that he’s written are “Woman’s Gotta Have It” which appears as a James Taylor cover on his
In The Pocket album:
and “It’s All Over Now” which the Rolling Stones covered:
So your favorite songs by him, aren’t by him? Good grief!!! I wonder which Bobby Womack song I want to play? So many….so many…. how about,
“If You Think You’re Lonely Now, Wait Until Tonight”:
I thought it was just, “If You Think You’re Lonely Now”.
Well, excuse me, Miss Know-It-All! Or should I say, Miss Pedia!
What would you ever do without me to correct you on things? Also, did you know that Gerry Goffin, Carole King’s ex husband, died; but, that’s a story for next month’s Death Report.
Why isn’t it for this month’s Death Report?
Oh, wait a minute, Shana! We forgot our “Funny Thing” segment! You know, where I recount one of the famous “funny things” you said?
Which one is it this time?
“Do cows make good pets?”
When did I say that?
And now for our Quiz!!!! As you may already know, Shana and I are having another one of our “completely different”, “famous people” quizzes this month!
Your job is to find the remedies for…
Basil and Sybil Fawlty of the critically acclaimed sit-com, “Fawlty Towers”!
“Fawlty Towers” is a British comedy from the 1970’s, created by “Monty Python’s” John Cleese. Shouldn’t you explain it to our non-British readers, Mom?
Wouldn’t you like to explain it?
I don’t think so. I’m not very good at explaining things….
So you’re not willing to branch-out from merely making announcements about tour dates? Well fine! I guess it’s up to me, again, as usual!
OK. “Fawlty Towers” is supposedly the name of a small hotel in England owned by Basil and Sybil Fawlty.
The comedy angle comes from Basil either insulting the guests who aren’t sufficiently “upper class” for his taste or fawning over the ones who are! Other causes for laughter come from Basil’s never ending cost-cutting schemes that always backfire, like hiring a Spanish waiter who can’t speak English.
Sybil, Basil’s wife, is very down-to-earth, level-headed, very nurturing of all the guests and is forever having to untangle the bedlam created by the missteps of her neurotic, cheap, and pretentious husband.
In this episode, called “The Psychiatrist”, one of the hotel guests, Mr. Johnson, has really offended Basil’s aristocratic sense of propriety; a “commoner” by all accounts, he seems to be primarily interested in chasing women and little else. Sybil is especially taken with Mr. J’s “charms”. Basil spends the episode attempting to prove to Sybil that lover-boy has sneaked a girl into his room! Complicating this effort is a psychiatrist who has checked into the hotel, causing the repressed Basil to be so self-conscious about appearing “normal”, that he winds up precipitating a parade of chaotic events!
Your mission is to find the constitutional remedies of Basil and Sybil Fawlty. Oh, and P.S., “Fawlty Towers” is the funniest show on television, as you will soon see:
Elaine Lewis, D.Hom., C.Hom.
Elaine takes online cases! Write to her at [email protected] 
Visit her website: elaineLewis.hpathy.com