To read last month’s full case quiz. Visit – What Remedy is Emily Gilmore (and Her Mother-In-Law)?
Well, how did we do with this great (in my opinion) quiz? Who wants to go first?
Hm… Hi Elaine! Just totally a stab in the dark here… Is the mother-in-law a Phosphorus?
Hi, Claire! A Phosphorus could never be so abrupt and cruel and demeaning and selfish, etc. as Emily’s mother-in-law seems to be! Phosphorus wants and needs friends, and is very good at making friends. Trix isn’t going to win any friends over with her brusque and chilly manner.
Yes, I know about Phosphorus, but she can turn cruel when her demands aren’t met.
You got me there, Claire! They do have a shadow side that throws people for a loop the first time they see it!
Is Emily an Arsenicum?
Yes! Emily is an Arsenicum!!!!!
Arsenicum came to mind for Emily because she seems very artful…
…at making others dependent on her…
You got it!!!!!
…so they can’t “leave”.
Exactly!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So well put, Claire! You got it, you nailed it!
I got Phosphorus “the queen” vibe from Trix, and was Emily feeling like she needed to dig up all the useless gifts from Trix and set them out for the visit because Trix would have been hurt or offended not to see them in their places? A reassurance of being loved/valued?
No, Emily’s afraid of Trix! Emily is trying so hard to be letter-perfect because Trix makes her feel so inadequate and points out every little “mistake” she makes, things that are of really no consequence at all!
But let me back-track for a minute and say this about Phosphorus, because I think there may be some confusion about it which Mati Fuller tries to clear up in her excellent book which many of my readers have, Beyond The Veil of Delusions, which is in its 3rd printing now. In fact, here’s a picture of the new cover:
As Mati points out, Phosphorus has the delusion that she is “alone on a distant island”; so consequently, Phosphorus people become experts at making friends to forestall this imagined terrifying event; therefore, people’s first impression of Phosphorus always is that Phosphorus is the nicest person in the world! Everybody wants to be Phosphorus’ friend! However, once Phosphorus feels safe with you, they put you in the uncomfortable position of having to prove your friendship to them over and over again! So many phone calls that tie you up for hours, so many requests for favors, so many emergencies where you have to find their cats, pick up their mail, drive them to their doctor’s appointment…
Eventually, after so much abuse of her friends, Phosphorus gets abandoned! Why? Why does Phosphorus so often get dumped? Because, that’s their delusion–that they’re “alone on a distant island”–they have to somehow make it happen! How can you maintain a delusion if it never comes true?
Your statement, “They can turn cruel when their demands aren’t met,” might sound inscrutable at first, but, not when you understand how delusions pre-determine your behavior, which is the subject of Mati’s book. But as for Arsenicum, no one ever thinks Arsenicum is “the nicest person in the world”; though I don’t want to leave the impression that Arsenicum can never be enjoyable or fun to be with. As Mati says in her book on page-1 of her chapter on Arsenicum:
“Arsenicum album can be cheerful, affectionate and passionate in his relationships with others. He can easily become excited about things and he can be both talkative and vivacious when something interests him. Arsenicum is often a sentimental type who likes to celebrate anniversaries, birthdays and other types of memorable days.”
So, OK, Claire, please continue.
Trix’s rescinding the offer of $250k? Was she being fickle on a whim just for the power play of it? Was she expecting everyone to praise her generosity?
She doesn’t seem to care about praise. It’s almost as if she presumes that all praise is insincere.
Or were they supposed to fawn all over her and adore her and instead it just all dissolved into arguing?
I think she knew that would happen!
Did she offer the $250k to compete with or “one-up” Emily’s paying for Rory’s school tuition?
Now that’s an interesting idea I hadn’t thought of! Nice one, Claire! I think there’s no question that Trix is in competition with Emily!
Or was the motivation out of a desire to be adulated and create an indebted gratitude and when she didn’t get that reception, when it didn’t seem like her offer was appreciated, she simply withdrew the scepter?
I think Lorelai showed appreciation right away.
I guess because I am not familiar with the ongoing personality dynamics of the show….
This was Trix’s first appearance.
I am not entirely clear on what motivated her to make such a generous over-the-top offer. Kind of funny you characterized both women as manipulative; they’re not the same remedy are they?
You tell me!
Did Richard “marry his mother”?
Brilliant, Claire!!!!!!!! You got it!!!!!!
I have never watched this show so I was glad you wrote out that summary. You dropped a hint about how Trix would likely remember every single gift she’d ever given Emily,
Yes, that’s what Emily, in fact, says, that she will remember every single gift …
AND where it *should* have been in the house (if she did not find them all in their places when she arrived), which sent Emily scurrying around. So I guess ironically, Arsenicum has a thing for neatness; the word “fastidious” came to mind. Is Trix an Arsenicum after all?
Yes! Absolutely! I did this quiz to see if people would get that both characters are Arsenicum!
“One of the most striking features of the Arsenicum Album personality is its fastidiousness. The persons are very hard to please. They are very critical & demanding in nature. They always demand perfection in themselves & in their work. According to Dr. J.T.Kent, Arsenicum is an “extremely fastidious patient”. Dr Hering has described Arsenicum as “The gold-headed cane patient”. The Arsenicum personality is obsessed by the need for order & cleanliness…
Dinner was 5 minutes late which really got to her — a punctuality/order thing
Definitely a sign of fastidiousness but also a way to make Emily feel inadequate and like a failure. So, you see–and I hope everyone picked up on this–this is how Emily treats Lorelai! So, Emily never learns anything from this experience. She never has the “aha!” moment, that she treats her own daughter the way her mother-in-law treats her! She never gets it! All that matters to her is that she’s “safe” in the end. I think this is why Arsenicum can’t learn her lessons, because her delusions are so terrifying: “Delusions, murder him, others conspire to”; “Delusions, conspiracies against him, there are;” “Delusions, pursued by enemies, he was.”
And her need to be in control and have power over; as you even had used the word “queen” for how she acted. Is it an inner inferiority that causes her to cast an air of superiority? Would a need for “order” also include “pecking order”?
Now that’s interesting….
An orderly, “proper”, response from the family to her 250K offer? And when she saw it all dissolve (predictably?) into emotional chaos instead, she took her 250k and took her leave of the situation?
You know, Claire, Trix seemed to really have it in for Emily! Maybe it’s that “similars repel”? But, she seemed intent on crushing Emily at every turn! Maybe it’s, “My son should be under MY control, not yours!” Again, control. Arsenicums have to have control and control over people as well as things. They usually have lots of money and they use their money to control others. I think that’s what this $250,000 was all about! I think she knew that the loan to pay for Chilton gave Emily an upper hand over Lorelai, so she swooped in to under-cut it! Arsenicums never give money away! I think she knew this would cause a panic and an argument, and when it did, she rescinded her offer “in disgust” but she succeeded in scaring Emily to within an inch of her life, and I think that was the whole idea!
Is Trix’s “I will die soon!” a hint?
Yes!!!! “Fear of death” is a keynote of Arsenicum. But also, GUILT is something they’re very good at employing; keeping people close to them through the use of guilt! Trix was on her way out the door and indicated that Emily was to follow. But because Emily took a little bit too long, Trix was implying, “I could be dead by the time you get here, you know!” That was guilt–and her pre-occupation with death at the same time. And wearing black–another indication of her pre-occupation with death.
Is she saying it like, “Don’t worry you won’t have to deal with me much longer,” or is it a bleak/hypochondriac sideways remark? Or just some dark humor reflecting her inner anxiety about mortality? Arsenicum has hypochondriacal issues as another form of insecurity/anxiety.
Right, yes, they are hypochondriacs, that’s another way of controlling people! “I’m going to die soon, so, you can’t say no to me!”
Arsenicums *can* have an aristocratic air and come across proud and critical and you mentioned something about how she is very critical.
Did she rescind the offer of 250k simply because she is ultimately stingy and would feel safer holding onto the money in a trust in case she herself needs it, until she is dead and can’t possibly have need for it? Arsenicums watch every penny, again due to a need for security of all kinds.
That’s right, they never give money away. She never planned to give that money to Rory, that was just a machination to take a swipe at Emily, under-cut her relationship with Lorelai, throw her into a panic, knowing she was never going to go through with it! But really, Claire, I think you nailed it when you said, “Richard married his mother!”
Hello Elaine and Shana,
Hello Miroslav and Jitka!
Here are our contributions to the July quiz:
Miroslav’s answer is as follows:
I finally decided for these remedies:
Trix is superior to others, delusion of being Queen – Platina.
This is the reason I don’t like writing summaries; namely, that I wind up doing people’s thinking for them. If the video was in your language, you might not have thought that Trix was acting like a “queen”! You might have said, “She’s really mean!” But, because I said “acting like a queen”, it’s taken as fact; so, you look up “Delusion, queen” in the Repertory and there’s Platina; so, case closed! But that rubric, with only 2 remedies, is clearly under-populated!
What do we know about Trix? She seems to really have it in for Emily! Why? Jealousy? Her son should be with his mother–not his wife? She wants to make Emily as miserable as possible, constantly finding fault with her. You could pick “Mind: jealousy”, “Mind: faultfinding”.
Why can’t we go with “Delusion, queen”? Because there are only 2 remedies in that rubric: Cannabis indica, which, of course, is ridiculous; and Platina. Here’s what Sankaran says about Platina in The Soul of Remedies:
“Much of the performance and superiority in Platinum has to do with attractiveness to the male.”
Is Trix making any effort to be “attractive” to any male at all? No, she’s dressed all in black–very somber, death-like; she even says, “I shall die soon” when Emily isn’t ready to leave on time for tea. Maybe that’s more of a clue to the case than her taking on the air of a queen.
But she does something else you have to explain. She offers a ton of money to her great grand daughter, Rory! Why? I think she KNEW (figured out) that Emily was doing with her money exactly what she (Trix) does with hers–manipulate and control others!
She picked up on it when Richard announced that he and Emily were paying for Rory’s private school education! Trix knew why it was being done: It was the “hold” Emily had over Lorelai! So Trix swooped down and yanked it away from her with her fabulous offer! Trix understands Emily’s motives so well because they’re the same remedy!!!!
Of course, Emily goes into an absolute panic! “Don’t take the money!” she tells Lorelai. For Trix, we have to use the rubric “Mind: Malicious”! And also, “Mind: Deceitful” because Trix had no intention of giving that money away! In fact, you really have to wonder if the writers hadn’t been channeling Dickens when they came up with a name that rhymes with “Tricks”, right? But, do continue, Miroslav:
My vote for Emily – based on transcript and a video views: Lachesis
Mind, Domineering, Dictatorial (controlling)
Mind, Suspicious (arrogant)
Be careful. Arrogant (Haughty) and Suspicious are two different rubrics, they don’t mean the same thing, and, I’m not really seeing “suspiciousness” here, but, I could be wrong.
Mind, Displeasing (Passive-Aggressive)
I can’t find “displeasing” or “passive-aggressive” in the Repertory. Maybe you could use the rubric, “Mind: serious disposition”, meaning that she is not cheerful or light-hearted.
No, that’s not it. She simply wants to be like the Kennedys. She fancies herself being a member of the “upper class”. What would you call that in Repertory language, “haughty”?
Mind, cunning, manipulative
“Manipulative” is a good rubric for Emily. So is “Critical”.
Mind, Talking, Excessive (wants to chat at dinner)
No, no, there’s no Excessive Talking or Loquacity here. She just wants to fancy herself like the Kennedy’s–a member of High Society–chatting about world affairs, etc. This is why Lorelai can’t stand her and makes jokes and sarcastic remarks all through dinner, because Emily is so pompous and pretentious.
First of all, thank you for the transcript of the video dialogues, which certainly gave you a lot of extra work for this quiz. The Gilmore Girls series is here at our TV stations in dubbing too, but since I am not a lover of series, I only know about it from hearing. Maybe if we were to guess “Colombo” or Hercule Poirot, I would be more familiar with these characters…:)
Oh! I would love to do Colombo! But because of copyright issues? I can’t find a full episode on youtube! I’ll keep trying!
Trix, she´s obviously Platinum – pretentious, egotistical, puffy, bossy, scornful and so on.
Yes, she’s all those things; BUT, you have to dig deeper!!!! There’s something going on here beyond the fact that she’s mean and bossy. I’m sure you read what I wrote above to Miroslav–Trix has got it in for Emily! And why? Well, maybe it’s because “similars repel”? They’re both the same remedy! Maybe that’s why they hate each other so much! But clearly, as soon as Trix asked, “Lorelai, how can you afford to send Rory to Chilton?” and it came out that Richard and Emily were paying for it, Trix knew immediately what was going on! Trix knew that Emily was holding this loan over Lorelai’s head because that’s exactly what Trix would have done! And what better way to stab Emily in the back than by making it possible for Lorelai to pay back that loan!
Emily, according to my first impression and the blatant usurping of her daughter is Arsenicum album.
Yes, very good, Emily is Arsenicum!
I quote from the Vithoulkas page: “Arsenicum needs people nearby more for reassurance and support in case something happens to him. For this reason the Arsenicum patient becomes very possessive – possessive of objects, of money, and especially of people who are near.“
Beautiful! Absolutely! To make sure that people are always there when you need them, Arsenicum will make them financially obligated! You can’t leave because you OWE them! And they are good at using guilt too! “I will die soon,” remember that?
In translation of Murphy I found these rubrics for Emily:
Mind – fear, loneliness
Mind – selfish
Mind – pretentious
Mind – a tendency to defamation
Mind – pessimistic
Mind – envy
Mind – censorious, critical
Mind, reproaches, others
And also, Mind: domineering, control others, wants to.
I wish you to stay with your daughter, always the best of friends, and that your beautiful relationship will never be disturbed by nobody…:)
HI Elaine! How are you doing?
Hi Krista! Pretty good….
I’m so busy getting kids ready for back to school, but wanted to participate in the quiz this month. I have never watched the “Gilmore Girls” before, but it was pretty funny.
You and your kids will love it!
I watched this episode and I think I have an idea of the remedy needed. Is it the same remedy for both women ?
If so, I vote for Arsenicum.
You’re right!!!! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!!!!!
I think that Emily had a headache from all of her anxiety about Trix. Arsenicum would help calm her. Trix has anxiety about getting affairs in order because she thinks she is going to die soon. Maybe she would lighten up if she had some Arsenicum. They are both domineering, fastidious, manipulative, critical.
Not sure how to convert some of the other modern descriptions to rubrics so I look forward to learning more from this quiz.
I think Richard married his mother.
Brilliant!!!!! You got it!
Yay!!!! Thanks for the learning opportunity.
Hi Maria! This ship almost sailed without you!
Yes I know, I have been thinking about it a lot.
For Trix I thought of nux too, but I will vote for Platina.
A lot of people did that.
But I am not sure about Emily. She seems elegant in manners and clothing. She tries to manipulate her daughter. She seems unable to tell the truth directly. She could easily say that she would like to see her daughter more often and have dinner without giving the money for college.
Yes, wouldn’t that be nice! But you see, Maria, as Mati says in her book, Arsenicum’s terrifying delusions dictate her behavior! She can’t take the chance that people will be there for her in her time of need, she has to KNOW they’re going to be there! The best way to do that is make them obligated to you!
Also she doesn’t dare to tell the truth to Trix that she hates her presents.
I think Trix deliberately sent her gifts that were hideous! Notice that her name is “Trix”, a Dickensian name if ever there was one! (“Tricks”?)
She doesn’t want to hurt her feelings, her husbands feelings? Or she is just afraid of Trix?
I’d say afraid. Actually, because she’s Richard’s mother, and Richard thinks his mother is a saint, Emily HAS to be deferential towards her, what choice does she have?
Obviously, she doesn’t like Trix. I don’t know, I haven’t watched this series before. Natrum muriaticum maybe? I really suck at this 😛
Maria, I’m really surprised, cuz I just knew you were gonna get this right! You have Mati Fuller’s book, right? Beyond The Veil of Delusions? And what does Mati say about Arsenicum? She says they use money to control people so no one can ever leave! And when Trix says, “Oh, I’m going to give Rory her trust fund now,” what has she done, really? She’s taken away the control Emily had over her daughter! Emily purposely paid for Rory’s private school education because it gave her control! Remember what Emily says to Richard? “She’ll never come back, you know; if she gets that money. Lorelai won’t come back, she won’t have to!” Emily thinks that people will only be there for her if they HAVE to!
Now, what is Trix doing? She never intended to give that money away! Arsenicums never give anything away! That was just a swipe she took at Emily–a knife in the back! She knew why Emily had paid for that private school, because she’s the same remedy as Emily–Arsenicum! Clearly she has it in for Emily! And why? Maybe because “similars repel”?
Now, OK, turning to Mati’s book, in the chapter about a relationship between an Arsenicum wife and a Staphysagria husband, here Staphysagria is on the verge of getting a very important job, where previously, Arsenicum had been the main support in the family. So here’s what Mati says:
“Since all Arsenicums know deep down that they don’t always treat the people in their lives as nicely as they should, they also know that there is a definite possibility that one day their loved ones will feel that enough is enough and decide to leave. Staphysagria’s financial dependence on Arsenicum made her feel less anxious about this possibility. If, however, Staphysagria finally starts making money, this can easily change. Staphysagria is very excited about this possibility. He will be able to contribute to the relationship and regain his dignity. At first, it looks like this will make both happy. Staphysagria gets respect and Arsenicum can allow herself to work less. But the problem is, that if everything works out for Staphysagria, he will become financially independent. This is scary for Arsenicum because it triggers her fear that she will be left alone. This is a classic Arsenicum fear.”
So you see, keeping people financially dependent on them is how Arsenicum manages to feel safe. Do you see it now? If Arsenicum has no money, her other option is to become so needy that the other person has to stay. Hence, in acute cases, the classic Arsenicum words: “Don’t Leave!”
Yes I have Mati Fuller’s book. I have read it so many times, but apparently I didn’t learn enough 😛
Then I guess it’s good to have these quizzes consisting of real people!
It’s a great book though!
I know! Do I need to do more Arsenicum materia medica? Or do you think you get it now?
You know, I was searching a rubric like this-bribing like- but I am not very good at vocabulary and I tried with controlling or manipulating and such.
There is a rubric about desire to control people. “Mind: domineering disposition, control others, wants to”
I ruled out Arsenicum because none of these ladies had the typical picture of Arsenicum-at least the one I have in mind- except the money issue you wrote about.
They actually do have the typical picture of Arsenicum. Emily is a “social climber”, wants to be associated with “upper-class money” (The Kennedy’s), she lives in a house with servants, she has a formal dining room with a formal table-setting, lots of expensive paintings, furniture, objects of art, expensive antiques; she, herself, is stylishly and tastefully dressed, her hair is done professionally, her make-up is done perfectly, you can tell she has fussed over her appearance; her speech is enunciated perfectly (“fastidious speech”, it’s called. You see this with all Arsenicums–“fastidious speech”). She’s critical, judgemental, has a disposition to argue, to find fault. Lorelai can’t stand her because she’s got all the wrong values, she values money, social class, status symbols. Lorelai values people and relationships. She’s always giving. Emily never gives–unless she can gain some advantage by giving.
Trix was completely dressed in black! (Pre-occupation with death?) Serious disposition (Arsenicum is in bold for that.) Fault-finding. Deceitful. Humorless. Rich. (Arsenicums are very concerned with money and usually have a lot of it.) Stingy. (Won’t give any of it away.)
Interesting now that you mentioned it, Trix seems like Scrooge McDuck…
Right, the Dickens character, Ebenezer Scrooge, was undoubtedly an Arsenicum!
…with loads of money in the bank and never giving a penny 😛
So… I decided, that since I quoted so much from Mati Fuller’s book, I should invite her to answer the quiz, thinking she would probably know the answer, and guess what? She did!!!!
Emily–neurotic, bossy, controlling people with money, guilt and manipulation – Arsenicum.
I think Trix is an Arsenicum too. She enjoys manipulating and humiliating people just because she has enough money that she can get away with it.
Listen, this has just reminded me of the great Arsenicum case Mati and I presented years ago. It’s called “Give My Regards To Arsenicum!” It’s the case of Caralyn’s mother. Does everybody remember Caralyn? Click below:
www.Amazon.com has Mati’s book, and I’m sure other places have it too.
Wow! I am all talked out! Let’s congratulate our big winners who knew that both characters were the same remedy–Krista from Nebraska–and Mati Fuller too! Thanks to all of you who voted!