Revisiting: What Remedy Is Marie Barone?

I have sad news.

That’s how you’re starting off the Quiz?  Not even a hello?

Hello, Mom.  Eugene Pitt died!

What?  No way!  Oh no!  Eugene Pitt of The Jive Five?

Where’s the picture of Eugene Pitt and Daddy?

Hold on, let me find it. OK, Eugene is on the left, Daddy is on the right (Richard Lewis of The Silhouettes):

And I guess this would be a good time for you to tell the “Never” story.

The “Never” story again?  OK.  It was your first concert!  You were roughly a year old, so it meant probably nothing to you that we were going to see The Spaniels, The Jive Five, Baby Washington, and God only knows who else.  Anyway…

But first I have something interesting to share…

Do you have to share it now?

it’s kind of related.  Back in the 80’s and 90’s, Nickelodeon had doo wop bumpers.  Do you know what that is?

Not really.  Oh, you mean station ID jingles!

Anyway, apparently Eugene Pitt was part of the team that wrote and sang on them.

Wow!  I had no idea!

Those bumpers were genius.   You can tell the “Never” story now.

I’ve forgotten it.

Mom!!!!

OK!  You and I were backstage, probably looking for Daddy, when I spotted the Jive Five climbing the stairs to their dressing room, I imagine; and I called out, “You didn’t sing ‘Never’!”  So they sang it right there on the stairway for an audience of one–me! 

Here it is now, “Never, Never” by The Jive Five. RIP, Eugene Pitt.

And now, fasten your seat belts for another, great and fabulous, Famous-Person Hpathy Quiz!

And we have you to thank for it!  I have been wanting to do a Marie Barone quiz for ages!  This is Marie and her husband, Frank, from “Everybody Loves Raymond”, a great show you should try to find, so well written!

Marie and Frank Barone

There are no full episodes of “Everybody Loves Raymond” on youtube, so I was in despair of ever doing this quiz!

But you, in your magical way, found snippets of the best one, namely: “Robert’s Wedding”!  I don’t know how you did it!

Above, from left to right, Robert, Frank, Ray’s wife Debra, Ray and Marie.

OK, so Marie Barone is Robert and Raymond’s mother.  By all rights, she should be a “Jewish mother” but she’s Italian—and I hear that’s pretty much the same thing!

She is very controlling and constantly interfering in her children’s lives!  She comes off as very sweet, but everyone’s afraid of her!  She’s manipulative, shrewd and scheming.  She subtly pits one person against the other.  She can be insulting with a smile on her face, so you can never be sure that it wasn’t just YOU, being over-sensitive, or misinterpreting what she said or meant; she always has an “out”!  You can imagine that she thrives on the chaos and misunderstandings she creates!

She always does just enough “right” to make you feel bad that you ever thought ill of her!  Maybe they call this kind of behavior “gaslighting” (based on a movie from 1944 called “Gaslight”). Definition:

To cause (a person) to doubt his or her sanity through the use of psychological manipulation

So, OK, Marie was in rare form in this episode!  Her oldest son Robert was getting married to Amy.

He was very nervous before the wedding so he went to the men’s room to be alone and catch his breath; so who should walk in?  Marie!!!!  Yes, Marie walked into the men’s room!!!!!  “Oh, hello, Robbie, Raymond told me you were in here.”  I mean, think about that!  What is the message here????  First of all, “You can’t get away from me!”  Right?  “You’re not safe anywhere, I will always find you, and I don’t respect boundaries!”  Also, “You’re still my little boy; you must be if I can be in the bathroom with you;” so, “You belong to me, even if you think you’re getting married—you’re still my little boy.”  Yikes!

So, as a side note, Marie’s not the only psycho in this episode, Amy’s brother, Peter, the red-head, played by Chris Elliot,

was supposed to pick up the minister for the ceremony, but, of course, he didn’t!  Seems he wanted to sabotage his sister’s wedding.  The minister wound up having to hitch-hike to the church, making him late!  So when the wedding finally does get started, and the minister delivers the famous line: “If anyone knows why these two should not be joined together, speak now, or forever hold your peace”, guess who stood up and stopped the wedding?  That’s right, Marie Barone! 

After the wedding, at the reception, Amy’s mother, Pat (below), pulled Marie aside and told her…

“Marie, perhaps Frank is right, perhaps you should go.”

“What?”

“You know, this wedding, whether we like it or not, was for Amy and Robert.  And you shouldn’t have intruded on their moment of happiness in the chapel.”

“But I was doing it for them!”

“Oh Marie, I think maybe you were doing it for you.  And you were so busy thinking about what you needed to express, you weren’t thinking about anyone else, including your son.  I think that’s called ‘narcissism’.”

*****************

OK, that’s all the clues you’re gonna get from me!  Click on the links below.  Unfortunately, youtube doesn’t have snippets of the entire episode but maybe this will be enough, I hope:

 

What remedy is Marie Barone?

————————————————-

Votes:

Pulsatilla-2

Lachesis-3

Platina

 

And we’re back!  Who knows what the quiz answer is, who wants to go first?

Hi Elaine.

Hi Neil

This show is shown in UK but must admit I never really took to it.  I’m thinking Pulsatilla for Muriel.

You mean Marie, don’t you?  Muriel was last month.

Right, Marie, Pulsatilla for the manipulation with a sweet smile, or maybe even Lachesis.

Well, I’m afraid you have to pick one.  You just voted for 2 remedies.

She likes to appear the victim or the innocent one but behind it is a plan, a scheme, to get what she wants, an emotional game of chess.  She makes those around her feel guilty if they challenge her.  Seems like her husband is the only one who dares to speak out as he can see through her, the others seem to know it too, they all sit down with a groan when she interrupts the wedding to give a speech, but no one dares to upset her.  I’m voting for Pulsatilla.

You picked the wrong one.

Bugger!  LOL.  

I don’t think anyone is afraid of Pulsatilla, Neil.  Is anybody else here today?

 

Hi Elaine and Shana!

Oh look, it’s Maria from Greece!

For this month’s quiz my vote goes to Pulsatilla.

Oh no, not again….

She is listed under Manipulative, Deceitful and Selfish rubrics.  I could add Clinging rubric also.

OK, but don’t stop there.  What are the other elements of the case?  In other words, what are the “keynotes” of Marie Barone?  You’ve already mentioned manipulative, selfish…but what else?  What was striking?

I thought of Lachesis too but I remembered Pulsatilla’s description from Philip’s Bailey book Homeopathic Psychology:

Her principal concerns revolve around her loved ones, and her life is devoted to a search for and then a celebration of personal love.

Pulsatilla nearly always has someone to whom she is devoted.  As a child it was usually her parents.

Later on her devotion is transferred to her boyfriend, and then to her husband and her children.

As long as she is with her loved ones, and their love for her is evident, she is happy, and is relatively free from ambition.

Feminists tend to see red when they are confronted with Pulsatilla.  She is quite happy to stay at home and look after her husband and her children.

In fact this is what she lives for.  She is extremely nurturing, and indulges her loved ones as much as she likes to be indulged herself.

Maria, Pulsatilla is GENUINELY nurturing.  Not so this remedy!

I haven’t watched any other episodes of the series to be sure that this is a Pulsatilla case, but from this one episode, I think Pulsatilla fits.

Is Pulsatilla likely to embarrass her children?  Think about what you just said: “…extremely nurturing…indulges her loved ones…”  It sounds like Bailey is saying Pulsatilla is “other-oriented”, but Marie is very self-oriented.  You know who seemed like a Pulsatilla from this episode?  Pat, Amy’s mother!

I guess you’re right that Pulsatilla wouldn’t act that way.  I’m not good at picking rubrics, though.

Just think about the elements of the case, then we can find rubrics for them later.

The most striking to me, is that she really thinks it is ok to enter the men’s room, or to ruin her son’s wedding.

Yes, exactly!

To put it generally, it is natural to her, expressing her opinions inappropriately, with that mild tone in her voice.

That’s what confuses everyone!

Like you said, no boundaries.

So what is the rubric for walking into the men’s room, or stopping a wedding?  “Audacity”!  It means “having a lot of nerve!”  Now, what else?  Why did she stop the wedding?  To make a SPEECH!  How many people are inclined to make speeches?  Especially in public?  Most people are afraid to speak in public!  So, there is actually a rubric, “Mind: talking, makes speeches”.  Now, what’s the other thing about Marie?  Controlling!  She needs to control her sons!  So where is that in the Repertory?  “Mind: domineering disposition, control, wants to control others”.  So, we could go on, but, what we’ve got here adds up to Lachesis.

Exactly! I didn’t know the words to look it up!  I searched about looking for “controlling” and couldn’t find it, I didn’t think of the word Domineering.  And it is maybe the first time I hear the word Audacity.  I would find very useful an article about rubrics, how to find them.

I used to do that in “Repertory Round-Up” (see parts 1 and 2) but I didn’t get much, if any, feedback from it, so, I assumed that people weren’t interested in learning where to find rubrics.

https://hpathy.com/homeopathy-repertory/repertory-round-up/ 

https://hpathy.com/homeopathy-papers/tidbits-42-repertory-round-part-2/

Thank you for your help Elaine, GREAT quiz!  Learnt a lot!

Thanks Maria!  I loved this quiz too!  And thanks to Shana for finding it!  Does anyone else want to come up and give the answer to the quiz? 

 

Hi Elaine!

Hi Krista!

Well Marie is quite a character!

I’ll say!

What I see is someone who is domineering, manipulative, has a love of power, selfish, loss of self control (she couldn’t wait till Robert came out of the bathroom etc.)

Yeah, I don’t think that’s it, Krista.  She went in there purposely, that was what was so striking!

And excessive loquacity as we see when Ray and the minister sit down during her speech.  All of these characteristics make me think of Lachesis so that’s what I vote for. 🙂

Yes!  You’re right!!!  Good job!

Let me know if I”m on the right track. 🙂

Totally!

Thanks again for a really fun quiz !

Krista

 

OK, I see Dr. Salma Afroz all the way from Bangladesh!

Hi Elaine.  Sorry i am not getting any suitable rubric for last month’s quiz.  Could you give me any clue?

OK, so, you have to make a list of the elements of the case and then see if there are rubrics for those things.  So, Marie…What kind of person is she?  What did she do in this episode?  She walked into the men’s room to, obstensibly, “talk” to her son; but, what message was she really sending?  “You can’t get away from me”?  “I have total control over you”?  “You’re still a child”?  And the fact that she does it with a “smile” on her face, could you say that she’s “deceitful”?  So, I would say: Deceitful, controlling, and she has a lot of “nerve”, too; right?  So, watch the episode again and ask yourself, What is Marie doing, and what does it say about her, then write it down, and see if there are rubrics that match.

Thank you so much for your clues.  Is Marie Barone Lachesis?

YES!!!!  EXCELLENT!

Yayyyy!!!!!!

 

OK, I think we may just about have time for the gang from Slovakia!

Hello Elaine and Shana!

Hello Miroslav and Jitka!!!!

Here are our answers to your summer quiz.  It is very difficult to think in such heat..:)

Oh, no kidding!  Its murder here, absolute murder!

I caught to see the video about Marie, but Miroslav not, because his computer was broken.  Today I found that the video is not really there anymore.

Yeah, I know Jitka, this happens a lot.  The video was taken down and I had to replace it with the few snippets you saw above.

Miroslav votes Lachesis.

That is correct!

I couldn´t open the video, so, I´m going to trust the description of “the heroine” of the quiz: manipulative, smart, scheming….

Good reasoning!  

I (Jitka) disagree.  As far as I am concerned, I vote for Platina.  At first I couldn´t decide because I was looking for the rubric “jealousy”.  By my opinion Marie was jealous for her son was going to be married.  Clearly Lachesis is winning in this rubric, but I have an idea that Lachesis wouldn´t be so awful a woman.  I think Platina thinks about herself she is “upper-crust”, but she just shows it off only with her haughty manners.  I didn´t like this woman at all.  I have assigned her such character features – rubrics (Kent) :

Mind, contemptuous

Mind, egotism

Mind, haughty

Mind, insolent

Everywhere here Platina is in bold letters and of course Platinum belongs to narcissistic characters.

Hmm…..  see, Marie isn’t insolent.  Insolent means “openly rude”.  That goes more for Tarentula.  Marie is “artful”, “cunning”.  She says, “I love you!  Everything I do is out of love!”  So in the final analysis, you can’t be mad at her!  Right?  She makes you feel guilty!  She gets away with her intrigue because she disarms you, you can’t fight back!

“Contemptuous”, I think, may be too harsh.  And I think maybe if you can actually watch the video (unless you’ve already watched it) you might see it differently.

But thanks for voting as always!

OK, who won?  Miroslav and Krista and Dr. Salma Afroz.  Congratulations to you!  Don’t forget to try this month’s quiz, and I’ll see you back here again in September!

______________________________

Elaine Lewis, D.Hom., C.Hom.

Elaine takes online cases! Write to her at [email protected]

Visit her website: www.ElaineLewis.hpathy.com