Thank goodness things keep happening to Kelly and her family, or where would I be? I’d have to keep eating at Red Lobster! By the way, a lot of Red Lobster fans have been sending in angry letters; actually, that would be one Red Lobster fan; so, in the spirit of equal time, I give you Barbara M:
Snoopy, I must tell you that as an avid lover of Red Lobster’s cheesy garlic bisquits, I find your insulting comments about such a fine establishment to be rude and dispicable. For shame. Barb.
Is there any more hate-mail? Because I’d like to get on with the August Quiz if that’s possible?! I present to you now another crisis dealt with deftly by the lovely and fabulous, Kelly Young:
Thank you. As always, I am somewhat honored to be here. So, it was a hot, muggy day the week before last…
And which day would that have been?
What do you mean?
Which day was that?
What do you mean, which day? Any day!
The whole week?
No, it was not the whole week. OK, for the sake of clarity, I’ll say Saturday!
And which Saturday would that have been?
Aaaaaah!!!! Yesterday, I was out in my backyard, doing some trimmimg; more like bush-whacking actually, as my backyard is all wetlands!
Whacking away, I noticed a stinging sensation on the back of my leg. I looked down and saw a horsefly the size of an aircraft carrier attached to my leg!
Oh my God, an aircraft carrier!
Brushing it off, I returned to work. Within seconds, I experienced a prickly sensation that began to burn and sting!
I hate aircraft carriers!
The area was quickly turning red and began to swell. I went inside and took a hot shower. Afterwards, I noticed that the redness and swelling had worsened and it was becoming very itchy. Soon the area was the circumference of a grapefruit on the back of my leg, just above the knee; hot, red and swollen. The area was a perfect circle, sticking out maybe an inch.
I took a 30C potency of a certain remedy, which I repeated two or more times within the hour and could see the redness and swelling decrease as well as the itching.
The next morning, the area was slightly red, barely swollen with little or no itching. There was no sign of it the following day!
And which day was that, Kelly? Hello? Kelly? Hmm…she seems to have left the building. If you know the answer (or where Kelly is), please write to me at [email protected]
The answer will be in the September issue.