Oh look! It’s little Shana!
I see we’re doing another completely different Quiz this month!
Well, Shana, for your informaaaation, since you got to do your favorite TV show last month, I should get to do my favorite movie; which, as you may know is….
“Beethoven Lives Upstairs”?
Exactly! A little-known Canadian production which, as far as I’m concerned, should have won an Academy Award — for Best Picture, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Score, Best….(What are the other catagories?)
Mom, I think we get the idea that you liked the movie!
LIKED?! People, do yourselves a favor, run, do not walk, to the nearest movie-renting place and rent this movie!
Mom, there are no more Blockbusters or movie-renting establishments of the like anymore.
If you want people to see the movie for themselves they will have to visit amazon.com. Anyway, I get why you liked it. Neil Munro (the actor who played Beethoven) did an excellent job. His portrayal was passionate and lively.
Before I forget, do you have any of your timely announcements to make?
Yes, have you seen our ad in the hpathy ezine?
Yes, but I don’t think anyone else has, it’s kind of buried in the side-bar in a cluster of other ads, look to your right, you might find it. Click on it, if you do.
It’s all about our March Madness Sale! It’s a once in a lifetime offer!
What made you decide to have a sale, Mom?
Dr. B is having a sale.
Our sale is going to be much better than Dr. B’s! We’re going to have refreshments, music, dancing…..It’s going to be the Sale of the Century!
I had no idea! Will there be animals? Rabbits? Cows?
Most assuredly! Here come the cows now!
Mom, those are dogs.
I was told there’d be cows.
Shana, you’re not a cow! Could you possibly move on with your timely “announcements”, please?
Well, so much has been going on! We have 90 days left until the Barry Gibb concert!
I’ll try to hold on to the edge of my seat for the next 90 days.
The 30th Anniversary of the Scorpions album “Love at First Sting” (1984) just passed.
Just passed what?
No, Mom, the anniversary just passed!
No one cares, Shana!
That’s the album that gave us such hits as “Rock You Like a Hurricane”, “Still Loving You” and “Big City Nights”. “Still Loving You” is one of their best ballads and it has this epic song called “Crossfire” that sounds like a military march.
Oh how grand! A military march! Just what the world is missing! No one cares, Shana! And as you know, there’s only one song by the Scorpions I like and I can never remember the name of it. Do you know who really had an epic song called “Crossfire”? The Orlons from 1963!
“Caught in the middle of a…Crossfire! Caught in the middle of a….crossfire!”
Mom!!!! No singing!
You kids and your rules! I never have any fun!
Don’t you have fun when I’m not around?
And when is that, pray tell?
In a little bit because I am going to play the song you like and will be in my own world.
Ah. Well, as long as you know your way back.
In case you’re interested, the song you like by the Scorpions and can never remember the name of is called “Believe in Love” released in 1988. Why couldn’t I have lived through the eighties?
The eighties?!!!! Why would anyone want to have lived through the eighties and witnessed the decline of the United States and most of the western world thanks to Reagan and Margaret Thatcher and their tax cuts for the rich!
Oh look here it is now.
“Believe In Love”, click below:
Now if you will excuse me I am going to play air guitar while Klaus Meine’s beautiful voice takes me away.
D’oh! And I’m sure you won’t mind if I take this opportunity to do the dishes….
I’m back now. My own personal heaven is great! Anyway, not only that, I just watched the Scorpions make an appearance via skype on VH1 and apparently they’ve changed their minds about retiring.
Oh joy! So I’ll be hearing about them for the rest of my life?
I guess there may still be hope of seeing them in the United States.
Oh dear God!
I know that if that happens getting tickets will probably be a whole big production and you’ll try and get out of going, won’t you?
I’m trying to get out right now!
I knew you would and that is why my cousin Jon is cooler than you are.
Jon is not cooler than I am!
I’m sure Jon would’ve at least played air guitar or something with me while we were listening to “Believe in Love”!
I can play air guitar!
You know who else is cooler than you? Andre Gardner!
He is not!
And speaking of Andre Gardner of WMGK, I should probably report on our road trip to Andre’s “Hometown of the Week” at J.D. McGillicuddy’s in Havertown, PA yesterday. I know the traffic was a complete mess…
You noticed that too! Why do I let you talk me into these things? It took us over an hour to get there, and coming back we got caught in bumper-to-bumper traffic on I-95 that made absolutely no sense, plus, how about mapquest sending us to the wrong address?
I will admit that getting lost was something we hadn’t planned for; but, it was fun seeing our favorite radio host again, even though the bar was loud, jammed, and a dump, but what caaaaan you do? Anyway I was very excited to get the Scorpions CD Andre was holding for me.
Again with the Scorpions?
There was a great version of their new song “Dancing with the Moonlight”.
Shana, it would be good if we could possibly move on to the Death Report. Did anybody die this month?
Shirley Temple died at 85.
I thought she died years ago!
Cute little Shirley Temple….
The news said natural causes so I guess it was just her time. 85 is old enough to die, right?
Yeah, I guess it’s old enough. I, for one, plan to be dead by then.
I always wondered why in the news she was called Shirley Temple Black.
Because, Shana, she married someone named “Black”!
That’s what I thought! However she was way before my time so I guess I was too young to remember when she got married.
Shana!!!! If she was before your time, you couldn’t possibly remember her getting married!
Good thought! Also it’s kind of pathetic that the only Shirley Temple film I will ever remember is “Heidi”.
I know, but, what an excellent movie it was! A real classic!
I don’t even remember the film you keep talking about where she patches up her parents’ marriage, and I vaugely remember a film called “Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm”. I also remember from somewhere Shirley Temple was always tap-dancing with a guy whose name I don’t know.
Oh dear! You don’t know? It’s Bill “Bojangles” Robinson!
You know what’s weird? I was watching a show on my DVR one night. It was a recording of a show that was on at 5 am, a show I love but you hate.
Yeah, there’s lots of those…..
Anyway a commercial came on for a Shirley Temple DVD of her films and then the next day, I find out Shirley Temple is dead. Isn’t that weird?
It truly is!
Anyway next on our Death Report list is Jim Henson’s son John who died of a massive heart attack at age 48.
48 is a bit young to die, don’t you think? His death was pretty unexpected. Apparently one minute he had been building an igloo with his daughter in the snow and then the next minute he was having a heart attack.
I’ve often wondered about igloo safety.
Who just randomly has a heart attack out in the snow for no reason?
I didn’t even know Jim Henson had a son. Anyway John was the puppeteer for a giant ogre Muppet called Sweetums. I’m not kidding. That’s really the muppet’s name.
We believe you, Shana.
Anyway, I don’t know if you know this but the Muppets have been getting lots of exposure lately because of their film coming out this month.
You’re right, I didn’t know; but, The Muppets must be thrilled!
They were on a Toyota commercial, one of which aired during the Superbowl. That is now my new favorite commercial after the Met-Life insurance commercial with the Peanuts Gang and then the Geico gekko ad.
I love the Geico Gekko! But I also love the Geico pig!
Also whatever happened to the baby E-Trade commercials? That’s brilliant stuff. Anyway the Muppets also sang “The Weight” on Jimmy Fallon’s farewell “Late Night” show.
I love the fact that everyone cheered for Kermit and Miss Piggy.
Well, you gotta love Kermit and Miss Piggy!
I guess that’s all for the death report.
Thank goodness because I was starting to doze off!
And now, ladies and gentlemen, it is time for…
The HPATHY QUIZ!!!!!!!!!
Put your thinking caps on! Watch these three clips from “Beethoven Lives Upstairs” and tell us: WHAT REMEDY IS BEETHOVEN?
And now, Shana, time for our new feature which I’m calling (drum roll, please!) “Shana’s Funny Things!”
You know, the funny things you said, as a baby?
Mom, no one wants to hear that!
Of course they do!
And remind me again why people will think it’s funny?
Because I do!
Oh Mom, do you live just to embarrass me?
OK, what’s the first one?
Here we go, it’s a “funny thing” from 1996 when you were 3 years old 🙂
“I don’t have to wash my hair, it’s still shiny, and it has perfectly rounded edges!”
🙂 (Applause-applause!) That’s it everybody! And don’t forget my Sale of the Century, 50% off during March Madness! Just click here:
See you again next time for another great and wonderful, Hpathy Quiz! Bye-bye!!!!
Elaine Lewis, D.Hom., C.Hom.
Elaine takes online cases, write to her at [email protected]
Visit her website: elaineLewis.hpathy.com